Advice

Q: I have been married for a few years and have children. When the wedding talk was happening, my in laws to be were told that my dad married twice and has children with both wives. They reacted negatively and almost used this reason to stop the talk. Due to their negative reaction, I didn't disclose that my mother was married before and has two children from her previous marriage. But after the wedding I only told my husband. Now, I'm scared of telling my in laws as they are very old fashioned and traditional. I am still in contact with my half-siblings (I'm sure their feeling are hurt by this). What is the Islamic ruling in this situation. I have no secrets from my husband.

Q: When I was a teenager I liked a boy who was very religious and knowledgeable both generally and islamically, So I told about this boy to my family. And we got engaged. He saw me once. And he liked me a lot since then. We talked very rarely and it’s only about our marriage preparations. But we couldn’t get married that year so he flew abroad for his studies. I haven’t heard any news from him since then. And I waited for the holidays so he will comeback. I believed I was engaged. But then I heard from one of his relative’s sister that he nullified the engagement and I didn’t know what the reason was behind. I got many proposals at the same time from religious students of Islamic knowledge backgrounds. But yet I found very uncomfortable to accept other proposals. Because it hurts me a lot and a lot. Though I haven’t had any premarital relationship with him, but I don’t know I liked him very much and his personalities. I mailed him because I want to know what the reason was behind, and told him it would be very difficult for me to get married with some other, because I liked him very much. But I didn’t hear from him. So I accepted one of his friend’s proposals and got married. but the i heard from one of my friends that he was quite upset for letting me go. (my friend knw this from her husband) I tried so hard to forget about that boy but yet I find so uncomfortable with those feelings. My husband knows my past because he was a close friend of him. But my husband didn’t know what I’m going through with the pain inside my heart. I don’t want to ruin my life for a person who had no interest in me. I prayed Allah a lot to help me to forget him. And I tried my best to give my husband’s rights. But sometimes I get upset for knowing the boy I liked was more knowledgeable and a hafiz unlike my husband. The boy also got married one of my friends, and I feel how lucky she was although I make dua for them whenever shaitan used to whispers me. I fight with these uncomfortable feelings so hard for nearly 4 years of my marrige but sometimes I feel weak. Please advice me to get out from this pain.

Q: Is there any dua or prayer to read so that we can get two million nekis (good deeds)?

Q: My wife is not responding to me even in basic aspects like respect. I am working out of town and come home every week. If she is in bed then she nevers gets up. She never asks me if I need water or anything. She is always reluctant to have sex and agrees unwillingly. I give Rs 50000 every month for the household expenses. 10 years ago we moved out of my parents home because they told me to divorce her or live seperately. Now I am tired of her attitude. Please guide because I am concerned about my 3 kids.

Q: I need help. There is a big family feud between my husband's family and my brother in laws family. I feel that I am stuck in the middle. I can’t even go to my sisters house because he won’t allow it and it is the same for my sister. Could you advice me on what I can do to resolve this matter?

Q: I am really worried about something which I did 1-2 year ago. I was 16 years old and sexted with a married woman. She sent me a photo of her breasts twice. I felt so guilty and sick of myself and cut all contact with her. I am ashamed of what I did. My imaan wasn't that strong back then. I am a born muslim and I just remembred about it today. I think first time was one night in the holy month of Ramazan and second time later. What should I do? Will Allah Ta'ala forgive me for my shamefull sin? 

Q: Could you please give me advise on the rights of a husband over his wife and the rights of a wife over her husband.

Q: I am writing in regards to my situation.

My mother is a single parent with my father having left when we were very young. Many people have sent proposals and my mum refuses each one without any valid reason. Now there has been one proposal from someone I like and I am happy with but my mother is refusing and when asked why says "just".

My grandmother (my mother's mother) and my mum's sister and uncle have looked into the man and his family and are satisfied with his deen and character and from people that know them we have found out that they are respected and humble practising people and the boy is of good character and practising masha'allah. I am very happy with this and would like to go ahead and the rest of my family are also happy but my mum just wont let me get married and won't let me even speak about it and doesn't have any valid reason to say.

I don't know what to do in this situation as I only have my mother as my guardian as my father didn't keep in touch since he left and my brother is only 20 and unfortunately got into the wrong crowd and not at home. My mum doesn't have any brothers either, only sisters. My mother unfortunately does not prioritise deen and I know that either she will not want me to marry for years or the people she may eventually consider will not be based first and foremostly on deen which is what I want.

I don't know what to do in this situation as I would like to marry this person and all the rest of my family are happy with the proposal. I would appreciate your guidance on this matter

Q:

1. I am a 30 year old married woman. It is 7 years since I am married. There has been marriage issues between us. Now he decided to divorce me. We have a 5 year old daughter. But I dont like to get divorced as it is a major sin. If he does so, is there any sin on me?

2. Also, can you send a dua to me to avoid a divorce. I am very depressed.

Q: There is a girl I really like so I told my parents about her and finally my parents met her family. Now the situation was to take the final call. I asked my parents about their opinion and they said that since they met the girl and her family just once they might not know much about her and they asked me to take a decision. They also said that they are neither opposing her nor forcing me to marry her but they mentioned one point saying that I might get a better girl considering the fact that the girl and her family has little less knowledge and teachings of Islam and they also said that they wouldn't have preferred the girl. But again they said that they are OK with the girl if I select to go with her. So I am really confused right now. I dont want to hurt my parents and I dont know if they get hurt if I decided to go with this girl. Please help me.