Fear of not getting married due to one's family background

Q: My mother comes from a strict Barelwi family. They are firm on many aspects of bid'at in addition to meelad, such as niyaaz, 40 day functions, kheer puuri niyaaz, urs, qabar reverence, and the like. In fact, they are the organizers and sponsors of these baatil events.

My mother said herself that in view of this behavior of her family, finding a respectable wife will be difficult for me. She said that people consider all this in marriage. Is this true? I told my mother that she has never indulged in this bid'at since marrying my father 20 years ago. Furthermore, I too am not a bid'ati. In fact, people know that I have strong aversion for such things and am even against the Seerat Jalsahs of the so-called senior Deobandi Ulama in South Africa.

Will this behavior of my mother's family affect my marriage prospects? Do people consider this in marriage affairs? Surely they will investigate myself and parents before just looking at the extended family? Please advise my mother and myself.

A: Don't lose hope. Try and look for a righteous girl and try your best to adhere to the sunnat. May Allah Ta`ala help you.

And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.


Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)