Depression and other mental disorders
Q: I am 27 years old. I was non practising Muslim, but 7 years ago I started practising. For a few months everything was going fine, but after that doubts started in my mind. To make the story short, I did everything to cure, wazaif,medical treatment, etc.I lost my mind completely, I was crying too much, I lost my job due to depression, then I was hospitalised and doctors said its OCD, anxiety, etc. It's been 7 years I am in doubts in basic Islamic teaching like hereafter, angel, and these doubts are down rooted in my heart, that whole day I provide proofs to myself, but it doesn't help. I lost every thing prayers, tahajjud, zakaat, fasting, Ramadan, because most of the scholars says that ibaadah (prayers) with doubt is useless and doubters will be among infidels. I also have some psychological disorder like depression, OCD, personality disorder, social anxiety disorder. Please tell me what should I do? Please tell me what is this, weak faith or psychology problem? I know there is no way of return for me, but I don't want to die in this state. Till today I am trying my best to clear my mind from these nonsense doubts but nothing helps. Please tell me should I keep going like this, or there is any hope for me?
A: Don’t worry about clearing your mind. Leave out all literature and media. Frequent the company of some righteous shaikh and aalim and read the Fazaail-e-A`maal and Fazaa’il-e-Sadaqaat in the mornings and evenings.
And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
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