Q:
1. I wanted to know the etiquette and sunnah when visiting the qabrastaan? What is best for one to do when in the qabrastaan?
2. What should one recite and what will be most beneficial to read for the deceased when in the qabrastaan (closest to sunnah)?
3. When is it sunnah and most preferable to visit the qabrastaan?
4. Is there anything mentioned regarding pouring water over the qabr? If there is any book or literature on visiting the graveyard then please do let us know.
A: Below are the sunnats and aadaab with regard to visiting the graveyard:
1. It is mustahab to visit the graveyard once a week. It is preferable that this day be a Friday.
2. Upon entering the graveyard, one should make salaam to the inmates of the graves in the following words:
اَلسَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ دَارَ قَوْمٍ مُؤْمِنِيْنَ وَإِنَّا إِنْ شَاءَ اللهُ بِكُمْ لَاحِقُوْن
May peace be upon you, O (inmates of) the resting abode of the believers. Insha-Allah, we will soon be joining you.
اَلسَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ يَا أَهْلَ القُبُوْرِ يَغْفِرُ اللهُ لَنَا وَلَكُمْ أَنْتُمْ سَلَفُنَا وَنَحْنُ بِالْأَثَر
O inmates of the graves, may peace descend upon you (from the side of Allah Ta'ala), May Allah Ta'ala forgive us and you. You have preceded us (in going towards the Aakhirah) and we will soon follow.
اَلسَّلاَمُ عَلَيْكُمْ أَهْلَ الدِّيَارِ مِنَ الْمُؤْمِنينَ وَالْمُسْلِمِيْنَ وَإنَّا إِنْ شَاءَ اللهُ لَلاَحِقونَ أَسْأَلُ اللهَ لَنَا وَلَكُمُ العَافِيَةَ
O inmates of the resting abode of the believers, may peace descend upon you from the side of Allah Ta'ala, Insha-Allah soon we will be joining you. I beg Allah Ta'ala for ease for ourselves and yourselves.
3. When visiting the graveyard, it is sunnah to stand and make dua. However, one may sit if one will experience difficulty in standing.
4. It is better to stand at the legside of the grave when visiting the deceased.
5. One may recite any portion of the Quraan Majeed and convey the reward of the recitation to the deceased. However, the following surahs have been specifically mentioned for recitation at the graveyard:
a) Surah Yaaseen.
b) Surah Faatihah.
c) The beginning verses of Surah Baqarah and the concluding verses of Surah Baqarah.
d) Aayatul Kursi.
e) Surah Mulk.
f) Surah Takaathur.
g) Surah Ikhlaas.
h) Surah Zilzaal.
6. One should then make dua for the forgiveness of the deceased.
7. One should not walk or sit upon any grave.
8. Nowadays, due to the abundant fitnah prevalent everywhere and one being unable to avoid the fitnah, women are discouraged from visiting the graveyards.
9. It is not a sunnah to pour water on the graves when one visits the graveyard. You may refer to our kitaab "The Laws of Janaazah"
And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
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