need to get married

Q: I am a girl of 19 years of age. My parents are strongly against love marriages and I have tried my best to prove them that the guy I like is not bad. I made his father talk to my father and then my father told him that he will meet him but he still hasn't met him. On discussing this with my mom she got furious and starting cursing me and said that its the boys family who should make a move and not us. I just said that baba told them that he would go and meet them and why do you say this now. They are so against it that they give me only two options that either i should continue with my studies or the boy should get married. I have m y own dreams and plans that i want to accomplish before getting married i just can't go and get married to a 21 year old boy who is a student himself yet. I don't say that i am not wrong but what happened i can not undo it i am emotionally attached to him now i don't say that they should just let me talk to a na mehram but at least make it simple for me. i just wanted to ask am i that wrong? They don't talk to me now. Am i such a bad child? Is liking a person that bad? I've tried talking to mama but she doesn't understand me after a sentence or two she would start cursing me and saying that she regrets having me as her daughter.none of my parents understand me and i don't know who else to talk to about it. my parents won't listen to me why would anyone else. i just want to know that am i that wrong to completely abandon myself from this family. Wasn't i a part of it once? And just because i started to like someone they will neglect me and curse me and not talk to me ?

Q: I passed my puberty and now as an adult can I marry... How should I convince my parents about it. 

Q: I have been searched to the best of my ability for some years now and always the ullamah of my country tell me to bear patience to a point now I think they pick what is in the sharia that favours customs and for aspects that do not favour customs they ask us to be patient. I have wanted to get married for the past for the past nine years but my mother has obstructed it from happening, I am 28 now and my dad has died when I was 12, it has reached a point in our living with her is unbearable we both dislike each other, though I decided to forgive her because I don't want to have to face Allah on judgment day complaining about all the wrongs that have been done to me, but she hates me she cries in her sallah complaining to Allah about me, she says I make her heart black (I can only assume that's hate for me). I feel she is oppressing me to achieve her motives. The problem runs really deep writing it all down would be extremely revealing, so my question now is "should I pack my things and leave her house, as she doesn't love me and I darken her heart because I refused to obey her flimsy excuses of the kind of husband she wants for me and the life she wants for her self through me. I would be moving to my paternal uncles home." I use to think of killing her or killing myself some time back then I realized it would jeopardize my chance of entering Jannah. Thank you for taking your time to read through, am grateful.

Q: I am B.Tech qualified student doing M.Tech. My uncle is repeatedly saying to continue M.Tech and pursue Ph.D and become assistant professor which will require at least 4 years. I am already 25 years old and want to earn as soon as possible as I feel I should get married since 2-3 years. But I feel shy to talk on this matter with my parents. I want to do a job but uncle insists that teaching will be better for me (by observing my weak physical condition due to black magic). Completing higher studies will require 4 years and I will be reaching 29 years till I complete Ph.D become assistant professor. Due to sexual temptations and to prevent myself from sins, I want to do nikaah, but my uncle and father is of the view that I should continue studies. What should I do? During 2-3 years, I had indulged in pornography and masturbation due to temptations. If I continue to study for 4 years, there is danger of getting involved myself in porn and adultery and I don't want to do it. What should I do in the light of Quran and Hadith? How should I inform them about this and convince them. Also I am confused as to what source of income will be better for me job or teaching? (Teaching is better if whole life is concerned except four years and government job is better if entire life is concerned)