Q: I am a 31 year old muslim woman with 3 kids. Mine was an arranged marriage and my husband was insistent to marry me due to my Deen inspite of the physical differences between us. He is tall, slim and handsome whereas I am short and plump. Later I came to know from his mother that they weren't impressed about our marriage due to difference between us. I told my husband to marry another if he wants. Later I came to know that he is interested in internet dating with women. We had to stay apart due to circumstances and I am staying with his father, mother and brother in laws. He used to come every 6 months but I noticed that he wasn't interested in sex although we were apart. For three years we din't have sex even he came every 6 months. Later I found messages indicating he had sex with more than one lady and was financially supporting them. He admitted it on questioning him and replied that he loves me only therefore didn't marry anyone among them. Me and kids went to stay with him for 30 days abroad in UAE on visit and found condoms in his cupboard, pornographic video in his personal laptop. I still decided to forgive him and pray to Allah. My father in law used to wake me from sleep by knocking the door. Recently while I woke up from sleep I found my father in law staring into my private part raising my dress. I didn't react on seeing this as I felt it will affect the whole family. My husband is abroad. On complaining to him he blamed me for sleeping without locking the door with key. My husband is responsible towards his parents and looks after me and kids. He takes me and kids to mosque, also cooperates in all charitable activities especially Zakat. He helps my family too in times of need and sends us more and enough money but I am deeply confused as to what to decide in my life with him because we are away from each other and communicates less when he is abroad. I can feel his love only when he is with us. When he is abroad its mainly his financial support that he tries to give me rather than love. Should I continue living with him seeing only his positive attitude satisfied with his money or take a stern decision to leave him? Expecting your reply at the earliest so as to relieve my mind. Thanking you in anticipation.
A: We suggest that you move away from such a family where your honour is in danger. You may request your husband for a divorce and resettle.
And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
Answered by: