Q: I started my connection with Allah from 2015 but sometimes I feel very empty like such kind of things come in my mind that I cannot tell... May Allah forbid... Sometimes I feel like I am on the edge of leading to kufr and than I say Astaghfirullah my life is very messed up. I love a guy but I left him without saying a word to him because I knew that its haram so I left.. but now all the memories come to my mind and I cry for hours and hours.. I want to talk to him but I cant because its haram... What should I do? I have no friend that I can share my feelings with her. I do tell all my worries to Allah but as I am a human, sometimes I need someone to talk to me too. I miss him so much. What should I do?
A: Start off with daily ta`leem and Qur'aan recitation.
Perhaps this difficulty you are experiencing is actually an excuse for you to strengthen your relationship with Allah Ta’ala. Spend more of your time on the musalla making du`aa to Allah Ta’ala and begging Him to assist you in this difficulty. Be punctual on your five daily salaah and obey Allah Ta`ala in every aspect of your life.
Allah Ta’ala in His kindness rewards such women abundantly. There were many women in the past who were greatly oppressed and underwent many problems, but because of their firmness and perseverance, Allah Ta’ala rewarded them with immense rewards. Among the highest ranking women in this world and the hereafter is Hadhrat Aasiya, the wife of Fir`oun. She was oppressed and tortured by Fir`oun but she persevered and remained firm on Islam. As a result, Allah Ta’ala blessed her with such a lofty status that she is ranked among the four highest ranking women in Jannah.
Make a point of reciting the Qur'aan Shareef and making zikr at home. Daily read out some portion from the Fazaa'il-e-A`maal. The recitation of the Qur'aan and noble ahaadeeth of Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) will bring about enormous barkat in your home.
And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
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