father

Q: My wife was abandoned by her father when she was 15. and then sought by her father again when she was in her 20's. just because of the reason he was sick. Since then he has been regularly taking money from her. Recently he sold the family house and did not give her anything, and moved to another city and bought a house, knowing well that she cannot come to that city often , because it is far and also because of her job. but her father is regualarly pressurizing to come to that city and also regularly taking money from her. I would like to emphasize that he gives the money away which he takes from her and also the money from the sold house he had left over he is constantly giving that away too. This has been going on before i got married to her. she has three children from her previous marriage. Her father has never treated her as a daughter, but only as a source of money.

Now my wifes daughter is sick and her father is telling her to come to his city. In this scenario who should she prefer, her sick daughter (who is 12 years old) or the father. Her father is again blackmailing her that he is sick or something. I would also like to point out that his father also has his wife with him (who is my wifes step mother) and also relatives in that city. But he insist her to come every month and along with giving him money he demands gifts from her.

Also whenever he calls her or when she goes there, he demands from her to get a divorce from me, because i am abroad. This a brief scenario, Am i within my rights in the light of Islam to forbid her to go to him?

Q: I am an Indonesian, married to a Sudanese (living in Madinah, KSA). We married in my parents' house (un listed in government), while all his family members and his mother knew that we were getting marriedm except his father. His father actually knew but he said himself that officially he din't know because he doesn't accept our marriage, because my husband is still studying. The problem now, my parents want us to make it in government soon and everything is just being controlled. While I really wish for his father to bless us for our marriage, what do I have to do?

Q: A person has a cat. He and his family love the cat. But the person’s father does not like him to keep the cat and he says to the person that he should not keep the cat. But the person and his family are so attached to the cat. They do not want to give the cat to anyone. The thought of staying without the cat makes them cry. So can the person keep the cat? If the person does not listen to his father’s advice because listening to his father’s this advice will emotionally hurt his family a lot, then is he sinning?

Q: My father has recently passed away and he got murdered brutally by a man who hit him on his head with a knife and then slit his throat whilst my dad was still alive. I loved my father very much and it feels to me that somebody has killed me brutally. I am worried that my father may be in pain or discomfort in his grave. I read surah mulk at night but I feel very restless.

Also I have recently been divorced (1 year ago) but my husband gave me verbal divorce and now he says that he can bring me back only if at the cost that I accept his terms and conditions once being that I may not be able to work for a while. I don't want to go back to my husband as I hate him now and I want to consider someone else (my colleague) who gives me the respect I deserve and loves me. What do I need to do in this situation? If I don't go back to my husband, would it be a sin? I feel frustrated that I haven't done enough for my dad and he may be suffering... I can't sleep and I have arthritis and fibromyalgia which aggravated my muscular pain when I am in stress. Sometimes I just think that I should die as all this frustration and worry for my father is killing me and I feel helpless. 

Q: My wife's father demands from her to massage him and bath him while he is just wearing bermuda type shorts. He ignores her condition or tiredness. I want to know if it is allowed for him to demand this service from her? Am I justified forbidding her to do so? He lives in another city and keeps on insisting for her to come there, totally ignorant of the fact that she has a job and kids to look after. Now he is demanding to move in with her just for the reason that she may serve him like that. He has a wife who is my wife's step mother. I do not like her massaging or bathing him in his semi nude condition, but my wife said that its a culture of their country.

Q: I like a girl very much and i am of marriable age. I told my parents about her and they went ahead and visited the girl's house. When i asked my dad if he liked the girl he said he didnt like her but if i persist with this girl he doesn't have a problem and will accept her whole heartedly. My dad has taken this talk forward and it is in the final stages but since this topic has started my dad has almost stopped talking to me. I stay far away from my town because of my job, i try calling my dad multiple times a day he doesn't receive any calls from me. If somehow i get to talk to my dad through my mom he doesn't show any interest in talking to me. I have asked my dad if he is upset or angry on me because of the decision i took he says "No I am not angry on you". I never knew that this would be my dad's reaction after my decision since at the starting itself he said he will accept any decision happily otherwise i wouldn't even have think about this girl ever again. I don't even know if his reaction is due to this decision or because of something else. I tried talking to my mom as well she says that i should keep calling my dad someday he will pick it up. I asked my mom if she can talk to dad and ask what exactly is the reason but even she says that dad isn't angry but i can get to know that there is definitely something wrong. I dont want to keep my dad angry or upset because of me, please tell me how can i solve the issue when my dad isn't talking to me at all ? What do i do when i know he is upset but keeps saying he isnt? Is there any specific dua or wazifa by which can help me in this matter?

Q: After the death of one's father, what can the children do for their father? My father died last Thursday. I saw him without any clothes and I am worried about him.

Q: I am a 21 year old Muslimah. My father wants me to start hifz with him at home (he is an aalim and haafiz). Am I obliged? I feel overwhelmed