Marital Issues

Q: I have been in a relationship with a person since 4 years. Since last 1 year he has made my life miserable by spying on me and talking rudely to me, relating me to other men and talking rubbish. We started fighting on these topics and somehow one day due to lot of misunderstandings he abused me to the core and told many bad words to me and my family. He broke every relation and stopped talking to me. I was very frustrated at that time and was crying everyday. I incidentally met a person on social networking and he was very funny and I used to divert my mind talking to him. There was nothing serious from both of us. One day he was talking something ugly and made non veg jokes. I stopped him once twice he did not listen. I stopped talking to him. After that my ex came suddenly and apologised and said he wanted to marry me. I didn't want to talk to him but due to his regular phone calls I had to talk to him. He came to know throgh my id that I spoke to someone. How ever much I try to convince him, he always thinks I had an affair and he don't trust me anymore. We both want to break this relationship but now we cant as our families are involved. Wo hamesha mujh pe shak karte even though I didn't do anything. Is it the right decision to marry him? I am only believing that he might change after marriage and moving forward with him but I am also very scared.

Q: Me and my wife had a verbal fight and she started screaming to me that Quran ki qasam tum mujehay talaaq do. What is your advice?

Q: I am having a lot of difficulties with my boyfriends father. He does not approve us being together and he keeps on threatening to tell my family and shame me in our community by saying bad things about me. He is threatening my boyfriend that if he does not leave me he will make our lives very difficult. I think he does a wazeefa as he had dreams about our relationship. We have kept our relationship a secret and only a few of my friends know who have no contact with his father or our community. Can you please help me and tell me if there is anything I can do to make him stop and for him to leave us alone.

Q: My question is my husband gives me money every month only after I have given him all the receipts and given him a full monthly expenses list of everything I bought for the month. Which I say is wrong because you are only giving money to feed your four children and us. Even if he buys something or gets something for 50p he will ask me to give it back to him what he gave me. Alhamdullilah he is a heating engineer and earns good money. Some months he wont give money till I give him a full monthly rundown. Please tell me in Islam is what he is doing right?

Q: I am 22 years, married since 5 years and no kids. My husband doesn't sexually satisfy me since the beginning. I have been patient all these years and now I am stressed and disturbed and I am suffering from other problems but my husband doesn't care for my treatment for babies and doesn't earn well and forces me to be in joint family with his brother's parents and brother's wife. I am stressed and I don't love him. Mine was a forced marriage against my will and I have sexual urges and he leaves me unsatisfied and I am unable to lead a normal life. What does Islam advice me to do. His parents don't understand my problem.

Q: I have been with a muslim girl for 3 years. We did things which were haraam. I did promise her that I want to marry her because it is not good to do such things without being married. But the fact is that I tried to marry this girl, and talk to my parents. But my dad and mum don't like this girl, because she is not of our "cast" and she seems not behaving properly because she has a strong way of talking. I mean that she talks roughly and my mother is now looking for another girl for me to marry which will be a better muslim, and better according to her for me. Now the problem is that, the girl I told you previously is suffering because I left her. She is like oppressed and she is saying bad things to me, like I will suffer all my life, that my parents did wrong with her, that I will have a very long life and I will see how things happen with my siblings or my children. In fact she is just telling me to fear Allah. But I do fear Allah. I ask repentance for whatever I do with her. I pray for her so that she has very good health and that she lives a long life. The problem is now she is suffering, she told me that she is deeply suffering and it is all because of me. Please tell me what should I do? Should I marry her even if my parents disagree or should I be with her, even after all the things she told me. I am not feeling very happy to marry her? (neither is she, maybe). I am very scared of Allah and don't want anyone to suffer. I just want her to be happy. I feel very bad for her, and I am just confused right now. Please tell me what should I do according to Islam. I would be grateful for your help. May Allah bless you for the help you are giving to me.

Q: My husband recently visited the United Kingdom where his parents live. He was there for three weeks. On his arrival I happened to find watsapp messages that he had sent to his ex wife. They were explicit. And obviously he was asking her for sex. She in turn was insisting that they must make Nikaah first. When I questioned him he said that he just did it for no particular reason. And he doesn't like her or want her. I'm so confused and upset and I can't trust him anymore. Further more he goes to the UK quite often and I won't know what's he getting up to there I'm in dire straits. I don't know what to do. Can I get a fask on these grounds. I really cannot take it anymore. Please help me.

Q: My husband's brother's wife always tries to get free with my husband and she never puts a veil in front of him and always try to get closer to him in front of me. His family always supports her and they always say that if he will stop talking to her the family will be break. She always tries to tease me and show me that my husband should pay more attention to her and I really don't know what to do with her and how to behave. I love my husband so much and I can't bear any woman coming near to him. Before my marriage he was a friend of her's because she is also his cousin but after me, he is being very limited to her and I think that lady just can't bear him being limited to her that's why she is trying her best to drag me away. Please give me solution. What can I do with this lady as I love my husband so much and I can't bear that woman.

Q: My husband walked away from our marriage (like many minor times in past) giving me the reason that he doesn't trust me, his parents will make decision for his life, he is dependent on them, his family will decide to who to name his business to and how his marriage life will move on. I live in USA and he came here because of my sponsorship, and since he has been here, I truly feel that he has gotten weak in this relationship of ours since he came to USA, and he was guided wrong about me by his family. He fought with me because of the things he was fed. He told everything to his family and didn't leave any room to uncover me and our marriage in front of others, as much as I try to hide our problems and to solve between us. He then never came back to me to resolve things and it has been 3 months. He stayed with his family, cared for them and cared for his business instead of saving the marriage. I don't know if I can trust him with my life one more time or not. I don't know what his intentions are for future even though he wants me back. Honestly the way he is doing things is as if he is picking the wrong time to do things and all his actions/deeds have not shown that this relationship is his priority. I seek guidance from Allah and I request some help or guidance for me and what should I be thinking or doing in this conditions.

Q: I am in love with a girl who is my aunts daughters. I want to legalise this relationship by performing nikaah with her but my parents are against it due to internal disputes with my aunt. Will it be right if I go against them as I see no chances of they getting convinced and if I want to convince them suggest me ways of convincing them. I feel very depressed and confused.