advise

Mother involved in a haraam relationship

Q: One of my friends has a very serious issue at home. His mother is having a relationship with a man for the last 10 years. She is still married to my friends father. The whole family knows about the mothers relationship with this man, even her husband knows. My friend tried talking to his family but no one wants to resolve this matter. He is very worried and his mother is still having a relationship with this man. He took all possible steps to resolve the issue but nothing happened. Kindly explain what he should do now? Can he break all relations with his mother and leave all of them?

Applying for faskh

Q: I want to ask a question on behalf my mum, who seeks to annul her marriage to my father. He refuses talaq, yet he does not support her and he lives in another town, he does not support me or my sister, but that is not the main issue, my mum is his second wife. His first wife passed away recently. He does not contact my mum but he does to come to 'visit', and he stays at his other sons house, and not by mum. For no apparent reason. My mum has supported us her entire life alone. She has never commited adultery or anything like that. She does require a divorce because he is neglecting his responsibilities to her. Please can you advise, or ask me for more clarity if you need to know anything more about this. Your assistance will help us a lot.

Khud shaadi ka intizaam karna

Q: Meri umer 29 saal hai aur mere abbu meri shadi nahi karwa rahey hain kio ke meri badi behen ki shadi nahi hui hai. Uski wajah se meri shaadi bhi nahi ki ja rahi hai aur baaqi ghar k kuch afraad rukawat ban rahy hain. Main pichley 17 saal se akela reh raha hun. Ab mujh se bager shadi k rehna mushkil hai. Aesi soorat main Islam kia kehta hai? Aur agar main kisi galat raah per chal padta hun to uska gunaah kis ko hoga? Waazeh rahay ke main pichley 5 saal se shaadi ka zikar kar raha hun.

Marital problems

Q: I was married before and have three kids from a previous nikaah. I am now married for 7 months and have no kids. I do all the house work, cook, clean, iron and it's taking a lot of strain one me. I don't have a helping hand and requested to my husband that help me get a helper even if it's 3 days in a week. He refused saying he does not dirty the house, my kids do and said he will never get me a helper. I asked him if was his biological kids make the house dirty would he not pay. He said he will pay if his kids dirty the house. His kids live with his ex-wife and Alhumdullillah he does everything for her and kids, which is the right thing to do. I am depressed because all I do is clean and cook and iron. I don't even have time to go to ta'leem. It's just a mess. Please advise if this is the right thing to say. Even if he doesn't get a helper for me, I will carry on this way but does it have or did he have to tell me in this manner?

Advising a relative towards making Du'a for her ownself

Q: My paternal aunt is sick, so I went to visit her. She performs all daily Salaah, Tahajjud and makes Tilaawat often as well. I motivated her and encouraged her to keep on making dua for the betterment of her condition. She then said that she 'lost the ability to make Du'a for herself' and that she 'no longer knows how to do so.' She said that when she hears the problems and worries of others, she becomes concerned and only makes dua for the problems of others. She said that she has not made dua for herself in a long time. Hence, I told her to read the Munaajaat-e-Maqbool as all things (both for oneself and others) are contained therein. Even if there is no yearning in this, then at least dua for herself is being fulfilled. (1) Was my advice appropriate for her state? (2) Please tell me what I can do to motivate her towards making dua for herself. She is old and faces health, family, and marital problems etc. She is a soft person.

Burning bakhoor in the Musjid

Q: We recently started burning bukhoor in our new local masjid on Fridays before Jummuah. We leart that this is sunnat and was also done in Masjid-e-Nabawi (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam). However a few old uncles in the masjid say this is a bidah and India custom and has no basis in shariah and have actually thrown the contents out on some occasions leading to disputes. Please provide proof from the Ahaadith or sunnat as to what is the actual ruling regarding the burning of bukoor or mujammar.

Musht zani

Q: Mera sawaal ye he ke agar ayk shaadi shuda mard jis ki bewi berone mulk ha  owr bewi say hambistri keay hoeay kafi arsa ho jata ha. To easi surat main mani per control nahin reata owr aksar kapray kharab ho jatey hain jis ki waja say namaaz ka nuqsan ho jata ha owr ghusal bhi karna parta ha. Kya easi surat main jab shawat ka ghalba ho to kya aadmi musht zani kar sakta ha kuonka easa karnay say 5 say 7 din aasani say nikal jatey hain. Janab is amal ka kafara bhi bata dain. I hope you understand my question. Please reply.

Pleasing one's husband

Q: I just want advice regarding my husband. Don't know what to do. When I go out with him even when I smile at a cousin brother, he gets annoyed and tells me I am committing a sin by smiling at men. Please advise me what is right and wrong.

Shubhaat aur wasaawis

Q: Mujhe jab ibadat Mai Karta Hu to din alag malum hota hai aur raat alag.kasrat se aamaal kiwajhse dil ko behad qarar aur sukoon mehsus hota hai jaisa Mai hero Hu.aur mujhe ye waqt aage b milna hai Jo mujhe samjh nahi araha k Mai kya karu.friends kehrahe hai k ibadat hi karni thi to padhai kyu Ki?aur Mai darta bhot Hu isk liy kya kiya jay?har cheez me end samjh leta Hu.aysi soch Maine qud banali hai junk mere pas always free time life me Mila hai. How to Change my mind?

Waalid saheb ki taraf se sakhti

Q: Meri shaadi ko 12 saal ho gay hain. In 12 saalon me meray walid sahib ne kbi b meri wife ko bura nhi kaha. But 2 saal pehlay meray chotay Bhai ki shadi bradri se bahir hooi. Os ki bv intehai shatir aurat hai. Os ki wja se walid sahib ne 2 bar alehda kr chukay hain. Mukhtasir ye k wo ghr ka kaam b nhi krti. But walid sb phir b usi ka 7 detay hain. Pehli bar jb alehda kiya tha muje to walid sahib ne meray bachon se moon mor liya tha. Aur ab 2sri bar alehda kiya hai to phir b muj se, meri bv se aur meary bachon se moon mor liya hai. Muje queen hai k meray walid pr koi jadoo kiya gia hai. Q k chotay bhai ki bradri se bahir shadi pr koi b raza mnd nhi tha. Ab sb choti bhrjai k plray me hain. Muje guide kre k m is soort-e-hal me kia kroon? Q k walid sahib ne os bahoo ki khatir sb relatives se b moon mor liya hai. Walid sahib ko sirf wo aur ka paab hi nzr atay hai. Baqi kisi b rishtadar k 7 hansana bolna nhi hota.