Advice

Q: I'm married for eleven years. Recently I caught my husband watching porn. I was very upset because it was the second time. And he knows it's wrong. Recently our intimacy has been very less and I suspected that something was wrong. I told him a lot of hurtful things and at the same time expressed my feelings. The problem now is that I don't feel like having relations with him. I don't even like him to touch me. I feel so used and abused and I know that I will not accept him now knowing what is in his mind when he is with me. I'm so depressed and disappointed. I don't know what to do. Am I allowed to stop sexual contact with him or is this a big sin. And how can I get over this disappointment and go on with my life. Please help because I love my husband and I also hurt him.

Q: I am 35 years old. Married with children. I have decided to take a second wife. I told my wife everything that had happened and want to take a second wife, but she refuses to agree. I do know that I do not need her permission but I would like to get her permission because she is important to me. The second lady has read her isthikaara and has accepted to be my second wife, she fully understands the regulations of being a second wife. Could you please assist with my problem.

Q: Does a man become a kaafir if he gets married to or has a relationship with a non muslim?

Q: My cousin is living with a Hindu girl in the same room. The room is adorned with idols and pictures. She keeps the Quraan Sharif on the same rack where idols and pictures are kept. To perform namaz she has to face that rack where idols and pictures are placed so she places a curtain in between. Is she wrong in anything and what else should she do?

Q: I have a problem in my tongue. I want to say something but I ​can't say it. I can only say 30% of 100%. Please give me solution for this problem.

Q: I'm a teenager who attends a mix state school. Wo​uld I have to lower my gaze at a female teacher who is teaching me?

Q: I am in great distress. I am involved in some illegal​ affairs with the opposite gender and although I try my best, I cannot get away from it. Mufti sahab I'm very tensed. Sometimes I feel like dying. That person also tells me to back off but i'm in great distress.

Q:

1. I am a boy and sometimes I feel so excited that I start lo​oking at girls pictures and eventually I end up looking at some obscene picturess. Even if I don't want to, then vulgar thoughts run in my mind and they make me go crazy. So then I masterbate but if I don't masterbate then it gets very tough and I end up watching bad pictures. So please tell me what to do because every time I ask for Allah's forgiveness then for some weeks I don't but again I do it. But please don't tell me to get married as I am 17 and a student so it's impossible to get married.

2. When I do ghusl after masturbating, it takes me 40 or 50 minutes to finish it. My mom told me that every hair of your body must be wet so when I am washing my back, negative thoughts pop up in my mind and then when I am washing my nose these thoughts make me waste a lot of water. And if I ignore these thoughts, I feel like I didn't do ghusl correctly. And I just wash the part of my body three times which are supposed to be washed and then I recite this dua:

"أشهد أن لا إ له إلا الله وحده لا شريك له، و أشهد أن محمدا عبده و رسوله"

So is this correct? 

Q: My husband and I are both reverts. I have no mahram to protect my rights. I found out on Tuesday that my husband has a new wife. It was secret for a few weeks (he claims he can't remember how long he is married. I estimate 2 weeks to a month) that was Tuesday, and on Thursday he left for a planned 40 day jamaat. As you can imagine, now is the time I need his assurances more than anytime. I am trying to be obedient and accept his new wife. I am really trying hard. But, he let slip that he bought her salaah tops, scarves and tasbeeh. In our whole 5 year marriage, he has never, ever given me a single gift. And he said that his gifts to her don't include me as it to help her live her live as a Muslim. Is that true? My husband, has told me many lies over the last few weeks, and I asked him multiple times. Does he have a new wife. He repeatedly denied it. He also lied about his repeated 3 days that he had recently. How do I forgive him, and start trusting again? My last, important question. How do I find my Allah again? When I try to pray or make my zikrs or even just speak to my Allah. I feel like there is a door in front of me that I can't penetrate. I can't sleep or eat. I am fasting so I can try to be closer to Allah. I am making my salaahs on time. Sir, I love my husband and I want to make it work, and I want to regain my relationship with Allah. I also have to accept her. If I die, she raises my children. And he is threatening to take my children, he is threatening to leave me and take them. If I don't comply completely with everything he wants. What can I do?

Q: I have a problem with depression. This is related to a girl I like and I feel that she is a test from Allah. But the issue is I cannot get her off my mind. I am a religious person but still with the recitation of Qur'an this ill feeling is still sticking and it's very hard to focus on anything else. She is not a Muslim which is the other issue. Please brother tell me what I can do about this situation? She is working with me which compounds the issue.