nikaah

Court marriage

Q: My question is regarding my marriage. When I met my husband I wasnt paying much attention to religion so we married in court as civil marriage. My father and mother left me alone in another country so I didn't have any wali present on the day we got married. Now since I learned more about Islam and I am concerned, I would like to know if our marriage is valid?

Equality between wives

Q: My husband has 2 wives. I am a working lady and share 60-70% of my and my kids' expenditures with my salary and job, but the other one is a house wife who is totally dependant on my husband. My husband spends one night with me and the other night with her. I work from 7 am to 5 pm. But my husband has broken shifts. He is free in the afternoon, so everyday he goes to my cowife's house in the afternoon because I am not at home and from there he goes to work again. On the way back to my cowive's house, he visits me for an hour everyday.

My cowife says that it is unfair that he spends time with me from her night. She also argues , "He spends the afternoons at my house because you are not available, it is not my problem. You can leave the job and stay with me in my house. Otherwise he should not visit you when it is my turn." She says that Allah will punish me for all this.

Please tell me where I am wrong? Shall we divide my available time half-half between me and my cowife or what?

Biwi ki pistaan choosna

Q: Agar shohar apni bewi ke pastan choose tu un men se pani nikal kar monh men chala jaye shohar ko pani monh men jane ke bad pata chale wife 4th mont pregnent ho aur dodh na ata ho lakin shohar uske pastan uske bad na choose tu kia nikah khatam ho gaya ya nikah qayam hai.

Having a walima after rukhsati

Q: I have been married for less than 6 months and will be having the rukhsati (reception) very soon, probably in a month. My wife and I go out occasionally and sometimes I drop her at work. We hold hands while I drive her to work. Is this wrong? We also cuddle at times. Is this wrong? We kissed few times. Was this wrong? What I mean by wrong was it inappropriate since the valima is yet to happen however I have not consummated her nor do I intend to until the reception is done in shaa allah but just have my concerns since I don't want to do anything wrong. Your advise will be much appreciated as the local muftis told me something about tanhai that if tanhai happened then I have to do valima with in 3 days. I am kinda scared and I don't get the point of tanhai. Also for your information we did have a small ceremony to inform that I have completed the wedding rituals. does this help?