Taubah and Repentance

Keeping a clean heart

Q: Its been a while I'm having some confusion about my attitude whether its something one calls self respect or sort of pride or ego. I'm not able to differentiate between the two terms. I'm aware of the virtues of forgiving others and have positive thoughts for others yet at times, no matter how much I try, I cant let go off the feeling that somebody did that to me, hurt my sentiments, and how much I try to get away from such negativity, it comes back to my mind with even more potential. Like, I will think "Did you forget what was done to you? Do you still wanna go and meet them? They cant be your allies like the way they used to be before.

One thing I would like to clear, it's not that I'm an egoistic person, I forgive easily but maintain a distance, even if my heart is willing to get the same ties back. Is it a version of pride? I need advice regarding my behavior towards such attitudes of people, even of close friends!

Taubah for making gheebat

Q: I've made gheebat of many people but now I have repented.

1. Is it necessary to ask them for forgiveness as they do not know that I've made gheebat about them?

2. If I've made gheebat about somebody many years ago and they knew about it at that time but most probably forgot it now, do I have to ask them for forgiveness?

Repenting for drinking beer

Q: I drank 2 small sips of beer that contains 6 or 8 % of alcohol but I didn’t feel any type of difference in my body. Everything was normal and no intoxication and nothing different in my behaviour.

My question is, can I go for payers to the mosque or I’m not allowed to enter the mosque for 40 days?