Q: The more I saw him act like that and hurt me the more my sihr took over and I remember repeatedly getting thoughts to hurt him more, something in my mind saying now is your chance to push him so hard that he will regret it. This came into my mind over and over and I got nastier and nastier I could not control myself either, this time I could not even stop, then all I remember was him coming up to my face saying 'if this is what you want then here take it, divorce, divorce, divorce. You asked and pushed for it now there you have it' I still went on not thinking clearly now more angry than ever, I provoked him more saying you going to regret this again and come crying to me tomorrow put it in writing you coward and he did, saying 'I divorce Fathima because of her family' I realized now that he was in such a state that if I put a gun in his hand as well and told him to shoot himself, he would have which he confirmed. That's how lost he was. I really believe without a doubt that he would and that’s the scariest thought! Even though damage is done to some extent I could not lose him forever. I love him for the pleasure of Allah and he is everything I ever wanted, I just wish this would stop! I then still went on and he still went on I knew he had lost it this time, lost his mind as he did not know the nonsense he was uttering. He then broke the dishes by slamming it to the ground, pieces flying all over and stormed up and down punching the wall and going mad. I kept wondering who is this guy he is insane! I told him you're a lunatic and he said yes that's who you've made me. After a while it hit me when I was normal again, I started to cry and then my whole world came crashing down. I did not know what overtook me.

Q: Please advise on how we can be assisted with the following?

My parents divorced in a court of law approx 23 years ago due to my father’s drug addiction and have never been in contact since then. I recently asked my mum if she sat for iddat and if my father gave her Talaaq. The reply was negative as he refused to give talaaq at the time due to our ignorance on matters of deen my mum did not pursue this further as she was advised by some Moulana that they are divorced.

I have over the years been in sporadic contact with my Father and he has/had a history of being in and out of Government Mental Facilities. It reached a stage where over the last few years he has lived on the street. I tried taking him into my place however he was unable to live with us due to his constant need to use drugs and the fact that I rent in a complex with strict body corp rules which made his living with us quite difficult. My attempts to have him institutionalized where also unsuccessful due to his unwillingness and the long waiting period at Government institutes. He thus remained on the street. We have in the last three weeks received news that he was quite ill and passed away. My attempts to confirm this with the State Mortuary proved futile.

The dilemma we now face is that my mum needs to know what her position would have been over the course of time.

Can the Nikah now be annulled or does she have to sit in iddat due to there having never been Talaq issued and the fact that now we do not know if my father indeed did pass away or not?

Your assistance in clarifying this matter will be of great help to ease the uncertainty that my mum faces?

Q: I am a recently widowed woman, who has met a man who is divorced. He has not been living with his wife for the last 3 years. He does not see either his daughters nor his wife accept on Eid. He has told me that he is divorced legally. I have checked with the home affairs and it is true. He told me that he had given her 1 talaaq and waited for her to come back home but she had not returned since that day 3 years ago. Islamically is his nikaah still binding with her? Can she still come back to him and their nikaah will still be valid? Why does he not want to make a commitment with me, has something to do with his nikaah!

Q: A revert is asked by his wife for a divorce, which he refuses. She applies for a court interdict after they have a fight and his Muslim lawyer advises him to agree to the divorce in exchange for the wife not asking for the interdict. He reluctantly agrees but still doesn't give talaaq. A few weeks later his lawyer says that the wife is waiting for the talaaq and he must give it. He writes "I hereby give you a divorce" and the lawyer adds "in this regard I give you 3 talaaq." He signs it and the lawyer emails it to the wife. What is the validity of this divorce and is it 3 or 1? The husband says he has never wanted the divorce and it was never his intention to give 3 as he did not understand what this meant.  

Q: If someone sends a talaaq with somebody. He sends a photocopy saying I give talaaq 1,2,3. No Signature on the paper. Now he says he didn't write it. Must she begin her iddat, or is it not valid?

Q: A girl claims that I am responsible for her failed marriage and accuses me of concealing from her the truth about her in law's and husband's evil character and habits. Prior to her marriage, when asked my opinion about the family, I told her family that from my interactions with the boy and his family and from what I had heard about them, I was never given a reason to believe that they were anything but good people. They then proceeded to do their own private investigations. The girl says that I should repent and will be questioned about my actions on the Day of Reckoning. Can you please also comment on whether a boy is destined to have an unhappy marriage if his parents were separated (but have since reunited) and if his grandfather made nikah with a second wife?

Q: I got married to my husband 3 1/2 years back. On the day of my Walima I told my husband to take me to his village where he has his house and all his family members are staying. My husband had divorced his first wife hence he said he cannot take me as nobody will be happy and I cannot face my family members because recently I had divorced. Since then I refused to stay with my in laws because it hurt my feelings and I also had to face many questions from my own family as to why my husband is not taking me to his village. I settled with him in Dubai and in order to financially help my husband I started working because he could not afford to keep me with him in Dubai. After 1 1/2 year of our marriage I delivered a bay girl. Since she was too small I had to bring my mother with me. I never forced my husband to pay the expenses either for my daughter or my mother. Since myself and my mother both took care of my daughter my husband started to avoid his responsibilities. He is very fond of playing cricket and whole nights on weekends he plays cricket. His friends and relatives in Dubai are bachelors and I do not allow them to enter our house. He gets frustrated and starts fighting with me. Am I wrong on this? Things became wors during the past one year and I left my home with my mother and daughter to my home country India. Even after that my husband use to fight with me and stopped talking to me for 15 days. After waiting for 15 days I came back to Dubai and found that my house is all messed up as his friends and relatives were staying with him. He Slapped me and asked me why did I came. When I checked his laptop there were all nude photographs and dirty video clippings. We had big arguments and he threatened me with divorce and his family is supporting him in all this. In order to manage things I asked him to forgive me for all the arguments. He always says that he cannot afford to keep me with him and he wants me to go to his village and stay with his family and he shall stay in Dubai. In all this situation as per Shariah can I tell my husband that I cannot stay with his family. I really care for him and want him to leave all the bad companions and fulfill his responsibility. I always want to stay with him but the price that I will have pay to stay with him is work and share his responsibility and put my baby into babysitting because he doesn’t want my mother to stay with us. As per Shariah do I have the right not to stay with my in laws in such situation?

Q: I am in a dilemma. My parents used to have problems. In 2009 my mums dad passed away so my mum went for the burial and thereafter decided to stay at her own mums house. Since then she hasn't met my dad. She wanted a divorce which my dad isn't ready to give, so she applied for khula. Our community is helping in this but they are very slow. She works at her dad's shop, so another man has liked her. Because our community is very slow, this man went to the qadhi and made him sign the divorce papers and the qadhi even performed their nikah but my dad doesn't know about this and there was no wali at the time of nikah. Both my mum and that man sit and talk. Please explain if this is halaal or not? 

Q: I would like to confirm the name "Umair or Umayr". This would be after the first Ambassador of Islam Mus'ab ibn Umair (Radiyallahu Anhu), who was sent to Medina by Nabi Mohammed (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam). Can you please confirm if this meaning is correct and what is the correct transliteration spelling, Umair or Umayr?

Q: Is there any authentic hadith from the books of hadith about the forty steps for each person to carry the janazah?