Advice

Q: Seeking knowledge vs time with family.

I have two semesters left of a 4 year Arabic and Islamic studies program and I am also a 4th year student of the alim course program. I am in my early 30’s married and kids and also full time job. I have been a seeker of knowledge for a few years now and have completed certain ijazas in the past and now attempting to complete the Alim course InshaAllah.

My wife has always supported me, but sometimes I see (feel) that she might be somewhat fed up with me also being busy. I spend a significant amount of time in books research and still with a full time job, also assist a local masjid that is without an imam at times.

I do believe spending valuable time with my family, but I also am fully aware that between continuous studies and full time work (which is needed to support my family) my available time is always at minimal.

Lately a thought has creeped into my head that I should stop my studies and focus on family. Im not unsure if these are whispers of the shaytan or just me being over whelmed. I am thankful for the achievements Allâh swt has allowed for me but on the other hand I feel guilty because the majority of my time is being filtered elsewhere. This is just me venting and asking for advice.

How do I balance? Am I doing too much ?

Q: Are there any particular azkaar that have been mentioned in the hadith to attain maximum number of Hoor al Ain in Jannah?

Q: Is there any particular dua or zikr that allows us to go to Jannah without any reckoning? 

Q: My parents want me to pursue architecture. But, I want to be a psychologist or an Islamic scholar. I have little to no interest in architecture. Which is the better option to pick? My parents will not like it but will let choose my own career.

Q: Frequently I go into a depression whenever someone unjustifiably disgraces me or is unjust towards me. In such depressive states I often don't perform Salaah and start playing video games and watching YouTube movies. It is obviously very evil and haraam but I don't feel like making any Deeni effort at all. I will even make Wudhu but delay Salaah until the time expires.

I often feel: 'Why should I not attend a haraam function if my parents are just going to scream and be angry with me'; 'Why should I decline jobs if senior honoured 'Ulama are all themselves comfortable and participants of haraam images and banks' ; 'Why should I be careful about na-mahrams when every single Aalim in the family without exception lives and interferes freely with maids and na-mahram relatives,' etc. Please advise me.

Q: I know someone who has been disgnosed with gender identity dysphoria. In this condition, one feels like the oppostie gender ever since they get into their senses and its caused during pregnancy inside the womb. When the baby is developing, some hormones are released which causes the coding of the mind of the child to be of the other gender. Such kids from childhood feel like the other gender and they also try to commit suicide. It's a medically caused condition by hormones and it is also in their genes. Is it accepted in Islam because it's a disease?

Q: Please advise me on how to refrain from committing the sins whispered by Shaitaan into my heart? I am constantly getting the urge to shorten my beard and wear western clothings such as t-shirts, jeans, trousers, etc. The temptations I feel are strong and forceful.

Additionally sometimes these temptations depress me when people around me misbehave with me due to my attire being a long robe or a long thoub which is always above my ankle.

Please be advised that under my current employment conditions, I have to live beyond city limits where my shaikh resides and it is very difficult for me to communicate with him as he has become old and frail. Additionally I have a language barrier that I haven't been able to overcome as I was born and raised in an Arab nation and educated in a western system.

Q: I want to pursue a career that is more or entirely Islamically alligned but my parents want me to pursue architecture in which I have little to no interest especially as it is not Islamically beneficial (except obeying my parents). I can convince my parents and they will accept but they will not accept very happily. What should I choose?

Q: Why do I feel attracted to mahrams also?