Rights of parents

Q: I have been living with my pensioner mother since I got married as I am the only child. We currently live in the same complex as my in laws and they are very accommodating of my mother and treat her kindly. I had a previous incident where my nanny left because my mother was talking ill about my husband, myself and my in laws. Bitter complaints and bringing me down. This isn't the first time. She has been complaining and bringing my husband down to many others. To the point where she makes herself seem like a victim and they actually despise me as she paints me out to be so nasty and cruel.

I have spoken to her on many occasions regarding this. She agrees not to do it and then a few months later I find out that she's talking about me, my husband or my in laws. She even complained to my mother in law about me continuously.

I have recently found out, once again that my helper (who also works for my in laws) wants to leave as my mother is talking about me, my husband and in laws behind our backs.

How do I defend my mother in a situation like this? My in laws know as the helper had to tell my mother in law to take her back full time as she works part time for me. I am at my wits end. I am so angry, hurt and frustrated. I cannot respect her. I want to know Islamically what is my duty regarding my mother and what rights do I have? I am so tired of her being manipulative and emotionally toxic. I am considering putting her into a retirement/old age home. It is as if she wants to intentionally ruin or cause drama in my marriage and between my in laws and I.

I need some advice as to how to handle this situation as my in laws are telling me to leave her and just continue as normal. I can't! I am so fedup of her causing unnecessary drama.

Q: Who should a man respect and love more, his mother or his wife?

Q: I get angry on small things and take out all the anger on my mother which I regret later on. Please can you give me some advice to assist me in my problem.

Q: I am a 36 year old divorced woman living at my parents' place. I have some past grudges and current complaints against my father, I consider him responsible for most of my misfortunes; but since he is my father, I need to be respectful, but the problem is I get out of my control as soon as I happen to see him or even worse, if he speaks to me or wants me to do something for him. All my distress comes back and my injuries get fresh again. This is why I try to avoid him but most of the time this is not possible since we are living in the same house, though I keep quiet in front of him, but as soon as he is gone, I start shouting, cring, beating myself and cursing him and using abusive language about him. I don't do this intentionally but it just happens and I cannot do anything about it. I am extremely stressed and emotionally disturbed due to this. It's happening for more than five years.

Kindly suggest some remedy.

Q: My dad is now a coronavirus patient and lives in another city. Being a girl, am I allowed to travel to another city so that I can take care of him? I otherwise live with my mother in another city... they have separated thus they don't live with each other. Am I sinful for not being able to be near him at his time of needs?

Q: I want to ask that in these days how can I repent to Allah almighty and how can I return to him? Also I disobey my mother and pray on and off not regularly, so how can I obey my mother and pray regurarly and read the Holy Quran?

Q: I am 21 years old. I love my mother but I spoke harshly to her today relating to my marriage issues and she cried. My father died when I was young and she alone raised me. I've hurt her today very badly. I've said sorry to her but I just can't get it out of my head that my mother cried because of me. Can you please tell me what should I pray to erase this mighty sin off my shoulders? 

Q: What should I do if my husband stops my child from meeting my (mother) parents?

Q:

1. I currently live with my mother who runs a business from home, many a times after I return from work she requires that I assist her with her business and this takes up my time for ibaadat and serving deen. Am I sinful in refusing to assist.

Note it is not household chorus but business related.

2. I intend getting married and my mother demands that I should come by every night to assist her with her business, am I sinful if I refuse in this regard as it will take strain on the marriage.

Q: If a man has reached old age and developed alzheimer's, such that he can not take care of his financial matters (paying for his rent, food, etc), who is supposed to take care of them for him? Is it his wife? children? siblings? someone else?