Q: I need to know that if the husband does not want children to study in standard English medium school because he does not want t o invest in education although he earns a lot. Can wife take step in providing proper schooling to her children on her own expense.
Q: I am making nikkah soon Insha Allah. I will become a second wife to this man. He is married to a very violent woman and this is one of my concerns as she has already attacked me physically in public and I'm sure she won't stop. She isn't afraid of him, she swears and hits him, in public too. I love this man very much so I have made sacrifices to be with him. My other concern is that they are married in community of property, that means, what is his is theirs and that means whatever he buys for me will legally belong to them and not me, which also means that should he pass on, she can claim my home and leave me stranded. What are my rights once we married? He wants to get us an apartment while his first wife owns a house. He has set up a trust fund for her but nothing for me as yet. I feel like I will be second in everything. If I do marry him, it will be anc, in accordance to shariah. Am I right in being concerned for my future or am I being selfish? Please advise me.
Q: I really need your advice. I am married for almost a year now. My husband works only on weekends at the Fleamarket while I work Monday- Fridays normal 8- 5 shifts. During the week he is at leisure . He goes to the Malls , sits on the beach. sleeps etc etc. This is really getting to me . I feel as a man it is his duty to take care of me. I asked him to go find a normal weekday job . He said straight out he cant afford to take care of me . That is why I have to work. I don't have a problem working , I love to work . But why doesn't he want to work as well. I compare him to other men and he gets angry .These days when i get home his not at home his either at his friends or looking for car parts for his golf. I got so angry last night because I want to come home to my husband but he is sitting at his friends house. We ended up in a huge argument, I broke his cigarettes and then he hit me. Yes mufti he hit me. He says I must grow up this is the 21st century men dont need to take care of woman. Am I wrong. We all want the good things in life to be at leisure. We live with his family. No body at home knows what he did that is why i am hoping to get a response from you. He says I am jealous of his lifestyle . Yes I am. I am lost. Must I leave him?
Q: I am married for 27 years and found out my husband is on chat room. Each time he tells me he is done with it, just to find out that he is still busy with it. He sees nothing wrong with it. I have access to his cell account via his cell and ID no. and I saw some of the disgusting messages. Can you please advise?
Q: I have been married for fourteen years. I have three daughter. For the past seven years my wife had affairs with different men and I tried every time to speak to her to repent but the affairs just happen over and over year after year. As a result of this my life been constant worry with no peace of mind. It is because I loved her so much I just tried to save the marriage every time. I have my brother and my parents here to stop this marriage but in my heart I still love her. How do I occupy my mind through this talaaq process because it feels like I am scared but I don't want to go back to this life. As I know myself I will try to go back and in past that is how it happen over and over. I forgave her but her affairs never stop. I gave her one talaaq seven years back and I wanted to know if I can give her the rest two talaaqs not in anger in any way, but just so that I can't go back to that life.
Q: I would like to ask a question regarding faskh. I have been married to my husband close to four years now and out of the four years we spent 6 month together. I wanted us to be a family and live together. I have been asking him for us to be a family but he keep saying it is not the right time. In the end I said, if it is not the right time to have a family for you then maybe we should end it and you find a sister when you ready. That got me a phone ban. Basically he stopped calling and refused to answer his phone. At this point I went to visit where he lives. Which is in another continent. I ended up there called him and he said you are not here for me. I did not ask you to come. I have been there for 3 weeks trying with no avail. Now he is refusing to pick up my phone and it is one year since I went to visit and he refuses still to talk to me. I would like to go for a faskh but I do not want to do anything unislamic. What us your take on this?
Q: I have been suffering from depression because of guilt for the past 2 years. Now I am married but the marriage has always been rocky with abuse of all kinds. I started a job but did an unthinkable mistake. I got involved with someone but I ended it because I knew it was wrong. My husband found out because I didn't want to go in with the relationship. My husband found every possible way to humiliate me in public with friends family. He even went to the nearest musjid. I asked Allah Ta'ala for forgiveness, pleaded day and night. I asked my husband to forgive me. I came back home but he still didn't stop the abuse and he picks on me almost all the time. I am starting to suffer from depression and feel like taking my life. Please advise me.
Q: I am a married woman 24 years old. My husband is abroad and due to passport and visa issues, I have to wait till I get over there. I pray salah five times. Now for the time being I masturbate secretly without the knowledge of my husband. I am justified. I can't fast as I have health issues.
Q: I am currently in the following scenario. I gave birth to twins in march 2015. My mother in-law was very sweet till I delivered but later on she was unable to accept the responsibility of handling the kids as I delivered through c section. She called up my mom and asked her to manage kids while she'll manage the rest of the home (authoritatively; important to mention here is that she stays in pakistan and had come to dubai for my delivery). She had a strong spell on her son (my husband) during these days. My relationship with my husband was badly ruined. He start acting the same way with me as my mother in law did. She was harsh after my delivery and had lots of complains with me though the past 4 years of my marriage I was the best daughter in law. Due to her this attitude she made my mom suffer in a cold way during all her stay in dubai. Though my mom was here to help her on her call. It didn't stop here 5 months after my delivery when we went to Pakistan for eid, she insulted and disgraced me for a 3rd person's sake. This person is out of our family and doesn't respect me. I just told her I want to avoid that lady and she started the issue with me. I have been feeling left out since I delivered. This was the time I needed more support psychologically and I was given none. My husband's opinion also changed about me because his mother didn't like me. He too started to have fits of dislike for me on almost all occassions. He started judging me through his mom's eyes though we had had a love marriage. I don't know where has all the love gone now. I had a maid for around 7 months to help me with the house chores while I look after the kids. Changed many but they didn't turn out to be cooperative as they were old ladies and wanted to govern their way, trying to become a mother figure. By 7 months I decided ill manage the house and kids both on my own. My husband doesn't want to help me with the kids and would always say you should hire a maid. Is he fair in saying so when I don't have the peace of mind with maids? Plus aren't the kids supposed to get some time from there father or don't i feel good when he just sits with them for an hour or so keeping in mind that even when he's with them its me who attends to all the needs of my kids. He just keeps an eye and I try to do the laundry or some other household stuff meanwhile. In all these circumstances what do you advise for me plus what should my husband do.
Q: My mum is refusing to marry me to a woman because she didn't find her pretty and she didn't like the girl's family. She says that they are dangerous and that the girl is not good (not respectful). But I know from mutual friends that the girl is righteous and she does her best to follow Islam, even if she doesn't wear Hijab. My mother had heard from a lot of families here that the girl's family is quite special and she doesn't like that. So she is arguing with me to not marry this girl. What should I do? I know from personal sources that the girl's family won't give her hand to me if I don't come with my whole family. Please tell me what should I do?