Marital Issues

Consent of the parents in nikaah

Q: I want to marry a sister but some problems have cropped up for which I would need your guidance in the light of Quran and Hadith. I am 27 (an engineer) and well settled Alhamdullilah and the sister 26 (a doctor by profession) were school mates but never spoke to each other. Later after a few years when we both were in university, we chatted online and met a couple of times. We liked each other and wanted to make the relation Halal, so the sister informed her parents. Her father met me and we shared a good relation. Unfortunately my parents didn't agree saying I was too young for marriage (I was 24 that time). The sisters father waited for around 6 months for my parents to agree but when my parents did agree (in the 7th month), the sisters father angrily refused the marriage and said this marriage will only take place over his dead body. My parents felt sorry for refusing the marriage earlier and they visited the sisters house, but her father didn't entertain us and told us to never show our faces again. The sister tried to involve her mother, uncle and everyone else to make her father agree, but no one in the house can stand up to him as he is the most powerful person in the house. The sister doesn't have any access to an Islamic scholar who could help her father understand and he is not very keen to discuss any islamic matters with anyone as he is not very religious. Its been over 3 years now and there is no way he will agree. I have tried to do some research on this topic, and I have found that most Hadith say that a marriage is invalid without the consent of a wali. We are from the Hanafi madhab and I think our madhab allows a girl to marry without a wali under special circumstances. What do you think is the best option for both of us now at this stage of our lives?

Making sabar

Q: I got married before one and a half years. Fourth days after my marriage. My husband met an accident. He had brain surgery. At present he
is paralysed on one side. He has a memory problem, can't talk clearly, can't make sentences, he can't work. After the accident I was caring for him for one year. Between this I suffered lot from my mother in-law. Nobody is caring for me. I am very stressed. Within forty days my life changed. After one year I prayed ishikara and I am planing to divorce him, but my husband's parents and not giving divorce and they simply extending the days. My parents are planning to do faskh. I want to know about faskh and how to do it?

Chatting to a na mahram on whatsapp

Q: I  want know is it fair towards a woman if her husband has a lady friend which he has more time for. He wattsapp or sms's her at night and when I ask him he tells me I am always negative. And this is going on for years. I told him that I will speak to his boss because they are working together. On Saturday I asked him is he so late on wattsapp with her, he blocked me on wattsapp. If he has nothing to hide so why did he block me? Please advise.

Husband not prepared to issue a divorce

Q: My husband is an alcoholic and separated from the past four years. He is not willing to give Talaaq nor accept Khula. We approached many ulema, still no results. He doesn't come for a discussion when masjid committees call him, doesn't respond to the masjid. I need advice and guidance in such case where husband is not willing to release even if I am ready to give back mahar. He just harasses and give troubles. He is an alcohol addict. He will be missing from the house for months together, some one has to find him and admit him in a de-addiction center. Again after a month again he goes missing, even now he is missing. I can produce the medical certificate regarding his hospitalization at alcoholic de-addiction centers. If I approach through court and lawyer, it is a burden I can't bear. I have a 5 year old son too. Need guidance in such a case to get out from this marriage.

Marital problems

Q: I have a marriage problem. My husband don't want to sleep with me. We always have a big fight in the house. I checked with people and they say that our marriage has witchcraft. This is my second marriage and our marriage was going well till recently. Even with my job as soon as I got the job it finished by itself in a couple of months.

Getting a divorce from a husband who is on drugs

Q: I have been married with nikah for 12 years. In the past 2 years my husband has joined bad friends and has lost his shop, car and all his money to casino and drugs. Nothing I do or say to him makes him change and leave the drugs and casino. From November he even stopped paying rent and
giving money for the house. I had to give notice and move out to a smaller place that I could afford. He is not even worried that I have left or where I am. I have given him enough time to change and come on the right path but he insists on gambling and drugs. I left him last month and have not seen or heard from him. I have sent him a message to give me talaaq but he does not reply. How can I go about getting the talaaq?