Q: Pertaining to occasions of janazah:
1. Is it necessary for the house to feed visitors everyday?
2. Is it necessary for close family members to eat together for these days?
3. Has this become a bidah as I notice this is usually done for three days exactly and if people excuse themselves others wonder why. This becomes difficult on the house people who are already coping with a loss.
4. Is it better for another house to offer to host visitors from far away to make things easier for the bereaved? Which way would be the most advisable in this regard?
With regards to new babies:
1. Is it against shariah to invite others to come and see the baby?
2. If they have already expressed their desire to visit, would it be appropriate to suggest a certain date and time?
3. Is it against the spirit of entertaining visitors that one declines visitors for a certain number of days?
With regards to Eids:
What advice can Mufti Saheb give to the ladies - our eids have become very busy and strenuous between looking after the in-laws and trying to visit their own parents.
Are we making things difficult on ourselves by trying to please everyone?
Often Eid, instead of being an occasion of happiness is only about cleaning up and seeing to everyone else. Alot of women have no time to sit and eat a meal the whole day. Is it perhaps that we are complaining for nothing as many generations before us did much more, albeit with alot of dependence on maids and also grannies and sisters in-laws all chipping in to help with children, cooking etc.
How do we inculcate the spirit of hosting in us without neglecting our compulsory duties?
A:
1. No, it is not even an act of reward. In fact, it is wrong for people to gather and expect a meal. All should make taubah for this.
2 - 3. As explained above, this is a baseless custom.
4. What we are encouraged to do is to make it easy for the family members of the deceased.
1. It is permissible.
2. If it is going to be difficult if people come randomly then this is a good option.
3. If someone is having problems, he may politely excuse himself. And if the men wish to meet they could meet at the musjid or some venue where the people of the house will not be interrupted.
Do how much you can do with ease.
There are certain articles in Fazaa'il-e-Sadaqaat. Look into the contents. You will find a good amount of material insha Allah.
And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
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