Q: I'm currently 27 years old, not married and I'm teaching in a Muslim School and have a few modules left to complete my degree in education. Recently I'm going through a difficult time. I have lost my enthusiasm for life. I would relate some activities of my life, that has led to my current situation. One of my weaknesses is that I'm very scared to take big steps in my life and live in doubt. Nevertheless, in 2012 I was fixed to a girl and I broke the engagement due to fears that I won't manage. In 2013 I went to see girls and I was happy with all the girls , but was too afraid to propose. The one girl I did propose , but I procrastinated with my answer and when I did propose no answer came. Thereafter due to my weakness and caught up with the social networks, I got involved with a woman who told me she is divorced, we got physical, but didn't do the act. Later I came to find out that she is still in her relationship, so I left her. الله forgive me. This haraam relationship I got myself involved, made me realise that I'm weak sexually, because I came early in my pants 3 times. I realised that I had this very bad habit which I have given up, that of masturbation which has led to this problem. I have lost my self confidence and very scared to get married.
A: Start off with the following:
(1) Ta`leem of Fazaa’il-e-A`maal, Fazaa’il-e-Sadaqaat and Bahishti Zewar for approximately 15 minutes in the mornings and evenings.
(2) Recite some portion of the Qur’aan.
(3) Do zikr of the kalimah, Durood Shareef and istighfaar.
(4) Make a collective du`aa at the end of each session, begging Allah Ta`ala for His special help, mercy and forgiveness for oneself and the rest of the ummat.
Make sincere taubah for the past and place all your trust in Allah Ta`ala.
And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
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