Q: Would you please answer the following queries?
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Q: I pray you can help I'm desperate for some direction. Me and my husband both work. I earn more than him. His family lives in another country. His father works but has a lot of debts to pay off. Me and my husband have been married for a year only so we don't have much savings. He pays the mortgage and I pay the bills. We cannot save much. He asked me if we could send his family £500 a month. I wanted to send less as we have just got married and need to save. But he got angry so I agreed to £500 a month to send to his family. He promised me that if in any given month we were short on money or we wanted to spend on us for example buying furniture then he would not send his family £500 for that month. He promised me we would only send them money if we were able to every month. We have been sending them £500 a month for many months now. We are planning to have a child. I will have to stop working in a few months. We can't live off his pay only so we need to save some money for when I'm not working. Also our house is furnished with old furniture from my parents house. Last week we went furniture shopping. My husband was reluctant to buy anything. He told me he didn't think we should spend on furniture because he wants to give his dad. £1000 for a visa to visit us. I got upset because we only have £3000 in our savings and we need to save for when I have a baby. He got angry that I said no and we had a fight. It's my money too that I earned so I felt I had the right to say no especially when we send £500 a month already. Anyway this month we do not have much money to spend and buy much food. We are living penny to penny. We have £3000 in our savings but we are not touching that because we will need it when I fall pregnant. So this month we couldn't afford to send his dad £500. But now he wants to take £500 out of our savings to send to his dad. I feel hurt because he knows we are living penny to penny this month so we don't eat into our savings but now he wants to send £500 to his dad? He gets paid at the end of the month I told him to send it then. But he got angry and said he will send another £500 then! I'm worried he isn't thinking about the fact that in a few months I won't be earning and we will rely on his income only which isn't even enough to pay the bills so it's important that we save now. I don't mind sending his dad money when we are able to. I feel cheated. He promised me he wud only send his parents money if we have enough money too, but I feel he prefers us to struggle so he can send them money. Am I wrong? Please please advice as I don't want to do anything islamically wrong.
Q: Can zakat-ul-maal be spent on musjid expenses, neighbours, people of other faiths, fi sabillillah when there are poor Muslims, orphans, reverts with no means to feed or pay for health expenses in the global Muslim ummah? Can zakaat funds be used to purchase a Lamborghini or a Honda for a Duke or Prince of London under the clause ' mending hearts, bringing hearts together or fi sabillillah'. I'm not Robin Hood but I think I can see right through the answer. I interpret Surat tawbah chapter 9 verse 60 in the sequence in which it was revealed, poor ones before others. But some people prefer to spend the money on their 'bethrons', emphasising on 'mending hearts' and others would like to spend it first on the travellers. I think there should be a separate intention for friends, neighbours, people of other faiths, travellers, musjid renovation, relieving debt and a separate fund for the poor, orphans, reverts, and zakaat workers basic needs. If the zakaat worker's salary exceeds the zakat ul maal, then the purpose of zakaat to the poor and the orphaned is defeated. I need the opinion of our dear Mufti on this.
I hope and pray that I haven't offended anybody, these are hard times and funds need to be spent carefully to earn more good deeds, sawaab.
Clearly the needs of the poor and the orphaned and the ostracised reverts and the families of zakaat workers should not be overlooked in our intentions. May Allah forgive me if I'm wrong. May my brothers and sisters in The ummah and other faiths forgive me if I'm wrong.
Q: I want to clear my confusion about certain issues of my married life. I have recently married. Before my marriage I was doing a graceful job. The reason for working was to eliminate my dependency on my parents and to support my studies which I did side by side of my job. Soon after my education completion my parents associated me with one of my family cousins in family. At the time of engagement the boy and his family were fully aware that I am a working lady. The mean time when we remained engaged they did not cleared the stance weather I will continue my job after marriage on not. After marriage my husband went to Saudi Arabia for job and left me here and we agreed that meantime he completes the formalities and documentation from Saudi Arabia, I shall carry on my job. Its been 6 months that we got married my husband did not care for my nafaqah and whenever I claim he tells me that I am earning money and he has some other things to spend on and refuses to pay or even becomes angry and threatens me with divorce. He forces me to spend my earnings on his brother's family and have taken huge amounts for his degree fees too. I was doing all of it for him thinking in my mind that soon I'll move to Saudi Arabia soon. But I have realised that he does not acknowledge my efforts and contribution I made. At the end of the day he says I have not done anything for him and he don't need my job and forces me to resign immediately. I am in a fix if I would stop working he will not pay me anything. How will I survive? I cannot ask my parents to support me. If I don't quit my job he threatens me off and on during quarrel on some other things to resign immediately. Please guide me in the light of Islam about my rights and obligations.
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Q: A young girl is due to give birth anytime inshallah. After birth she's set to go to her parents home for her confinement. Now she receives the news that her parents will be going out in masturaat jamaat. This young girl was sad and depress and pleaded for them not to go now and may be go on another occasion but they would not listen. When they will be away the girls aunties and sister will take care of her. There family members are from other towns though, causing them to leave their respected husbands and children to take care of her needs. Will this be correct or what should be done?
Q: My baby girl was born 6 days ago on 10th September 2013. I am confused in deciding her name. Can you please tell me what we should name
her? AMANI or ASMARA are the 2 options.
Q: My husband sometimes gets very moody and talks rudely to me. This is getting out of hand so we spoke about it and he agreed to stop. My husband is very weak and we both know that when he is moody he can't control himself and he will speak rudely to me. We both agreed verbally that if he speaks rudely to me I won't have any physical relations with him for 3 days. Mufti if within those 3 days if he asks me to have a relation with him and I refuse am I sinful?
Q: I saw that my aunty was weeping and that my deceased uncle has gone and I am standing near her and I made some dua that I can't remember. Can you please tell me how to get rid of these dreams I am in a state of panic seeing these types of dreams almost everyday?