Advice

Q: My question is that I am suffering from inferiority complex. I mean despite having friends, good family, beauty, money and all these, my heart is not satisfied. I only think with myself that I don't have any friend, I get serious on small jokes of my friends, I get too much tension from small things. I think that the people are ignoring me, if two of my friends are going closer and I am a little on distance with them I feel that they don't care of me, whenever I look to the handwriting of my friend my heart says that there writing is better than mine. Simply I would like to say that I have no peace of heart and mind and I always consider myself smaller than others. Please tell me the reason and treatment.

Q: Sometimes people have these strange looks in their faces that is annoying and sometimes they can't help it. You realise this when you are having a conversation with them. I want to know, please can this be linked or traced to hypocrisy or mental behaviour of the face, insincerity, or due to effect of sins done with the face or any form of sins? Please I want to Know.

Q: I'm facing a hardship but as my namaz/nafawil/ibaadat has increased I can estimate that it is a test/azmaaish on me. How to pass Allah's test of hardship? Azmaaish? What if I fail to pass the test what will happen?

Q: I feel as if my husband is too strict with me. Before he wasn't like this when we got married but now he stops me from a lot of things. I've never had to live a life with so many restrictions. It's very hard but I listen to my husband in everything. But nowadays I just feel like running away from everything. I have locked up everything inside me and I feel trapped. I can't go anywhere. He has become too Islamic. I just don't know what to do. I'm sad all the time and depressed. None of my relatives even meet us now because of how he has become. He has changed too much in such short time and I haven't adjusted to all this yet.

Q: I am married and have kids. Through out my marriage I had a lot of problems. I stayed because of my kids. The issues were mainly my wife is listening to her brothers and parents who have just become rich and I still belongs to the middle class. She just argued on everything and when she is at her parents home she lies about me (means doing Gheebat in indirect ways). She goes with her parents on outings without me. I clearly told her that try to live happily with the salary I earn and don't keep your eyes on your brothers money. But then she started arguing by saying that my brother is giving me money and taking me out and you have to live alone if you cannot spent for me and for yourself. (If I to her as Greedy, I would be correct). She even shouts in front of me and doesn't even let me touch her as for marital intercourse or for anything and just saying that you are having just lust for sex, but cannot fulfil my other dressing and so on. She even prays 5 times a day and reads Qur'an also. Will it be acceptable by Allah Ta'ala in this situation? Please help and also advise that what should i do?

Q: An activity would be coming up for students hosted by ustaads. Please advise as a student would it be more respectful to involve your asaatiza in the fun that you are having or not. E.g. There are swimming facilities available (totally according and abiding by the laws of shariah) would it be considered disrespectful if the student splashes water on the ustaad, bearing in mind that it was only done out of muhabbat, shafqat and for the sole reason of having fun with an ustaad. Aside from that please provide a few guidelines indicating the manner of respect when dealing or being in the company of asaatiza.

Q:

1. Is it wrong for me to get upset with my husband if he only takes me to the haram for a few hours, where I'd like to spend more time?

2. Would this be regarded as waswasah if it is wrong?

3. If it's waswasah what should I do or read?

Q: I have come to Saudi for Hajj. I was first in Medina where I would cry a lot out of repentance and when I used to make dua, after a few days I have gone so hard that I can not cry any longer, even though I pretend to cry it's very difficult, is this a bad thing? Is this a sign of my Duaas not been accepted? If so please advice me as what to do.

Q: I have a very serious concern. Sometimes when our spirituality goes down, we find it very difficult to perform good deeds, or to be steadfast in performing them regularly, we become very weak and sometimes we become so guilty that bad thoughts and ideas crosses our mind very frequently, and for the one who is concerned for his Iman, it brings great pain and dissatisfaction to the heart. Please I want to know how can someone be able to preserve and maintain his Iman forever. And secondly, if we find ourselves weak in Iman, (that causes us pain sometimes), how to increase it again so that we can feel it in our heart, the sweetness of it?

Q: There are old ladies in my extended family with very deviated and corrupted beliefs. For everything they run to Darghas, brushing themselves with peacock feathers at these places, calling unto Hadhrat Sayyid Abdul Qadir Jeelaani (rahmatullahi ‘alaih), having their annual 'Keer Puree Niyaaz,' getting Taweez's from fusaaq and women who work with strange men and other nonsense. Furthermore, they spend their time gossiping over the phone, are regulars on the Hindu films and series that air all day and are avid with newspaper reading. They have no time for Salaah apparently. Their lives are also miserable with a number of health problems caused by overeating and drinking Fanta, Coke etc. the whole day. Even that, they proudly mention how their daughters work as an airhostess or even a TV news reporter. Many times, we have received calls at odd hours of the day to watch their daughter bareheaded and exposed on international news. Or how healthy and good lives their daughters live since they are regular at the gym or studying medicine in a distant university (without a mahram). The thinking is completely corrupted. My extended family are Berelwis.

(1) How can we work to correct them - even slowly and amicable? I get extremely frustrated when they mention all the difficulties they face and how hard everything is for them, when I feel that this is nothing but a direct consequence of all the Bid’ah nonsense they perpetrate at the expense of Shariah. Even with Bid’ah aside, everything else is corrupted. These are old women.

(2) I am a male. With the exception the Bid’ah nonsense, how can I prevent my own understanding and thinking to be diverted and polluted to such an evil extent, as I grow older?

(3) Should we make Du’a to Allah Ta’ala to hasten the coming of Imaam Mahdi (Alayhis Salaam) so that we can be safeguarded from such Dajjali and Shaytaani effects currently around us?