Advice

Q: How do we respond to the foolish and stupid statements of fellow laymen when they comment on Deeni matters wherein they utter completely incorrect things? Like those who comment on the Qur'an Sharaeef, Ahadith, Masaa'il and the Auliya with their own concocted reasoning and personal thoughts. Not salafi's etc., but just fellow faasiq lay people who act as Deeni experts. Many a time, one is not in a position to reason with them, or there is the fear they will utter even worse commentaries on the Shari'a. When these people utter their statements of personal, clear-cut haraam, reasoning, can we respond by saying 'Ok' - maybe it is a neutral statement (I do not know)? Or will Allah Ta'ala punish us for not arguing the Haq despite these people being stubborn with their commentaries on Deen?

Q: I am a black South African born Muslim. I have a problem with my mother. She goes to those sangoma (witchcraft) ladies and this lady has led her to believe that we are out to kill her. She sprinkles the house with the water of that woman. Recently she went to fetch my late brother and her late fathers sand from the grave yard which she took to that lady then brought back home and she kept my brothers sand in her room and her fathers in my room as if that was not enough she has now started saying I am bewitching her. I don't understand, we don't have any valuables that she can say I can bewitch for so my fears are the last time she started like this with my brother he passed away. I am worried mostly because I am a single mother of three children so I am working Monday to Saturday so my Imaan and Salaah are not strong enough and Allah forbid something happens to me what will my 3 girls become of them please help me with advice and as many duas as possible that Allah spares me till my children are big enough to look after each other and themselves. I am all they have got please help me. I'm so confused and afraid. It's like I have no peace.

Q:

1. This is my second marriage. Is it permissible that my daughter and my husband's son live in the same house?
2. Is it permissible that my husband speak to his x wife, knowing I am unhappy about it. The kids live with my husband and I. Or can she speak to me regarding the kids since I am the mother figure.
3. Is it a must that I care for his kids, or can they live with their mother which they want but my husband does not. She is working and capable of supporting them. I personally can't take care of them anymore, due to their mother's interference in my marriage and household. I feel like I am forced to care for them because I have to abide by my in-laws and their mother's conditions.Which my husband doesn't know how to deal with.

Q: My husband is never home. He comes from work and is perpetually at a meeting. Married for 15 years with 3 children. He leaves at 7 and returns at 2 am. I have made sabar for years now. He is not fulfilling my needs of companionship or intimacy. What is my way forward? This is disrespectful and selfish. Please help me make a decision within Shariah.

Q: Sometimes you have this feeling that all what you are doing in the name of Islam is just for show off (to people) and sometimes you are not too satisfied after doing a good deed like praying, charity or any ibadah for the fact that you think all what you are doing is just hypocritical. You never have this feeling of sincerity to please Allah anymore. You always look good on the outside (for e.g you pray 5 times daily very often in the Masjid, you fast optional fasting, etc), but deep inside, very deep inside you, you have this weakness and very dangerous thoughts about God and this brings unhappiness and guilt in you. Please how can I get rid of this and what is the root cause of this?

Q: I have been married now for 15 years. I have three children. My son is doing hifz. I just found out that my husband has been closely associated with a mutual friend. He has helped her purchase a car and often chats and gives her company as her husband has left her. She is Muslim but frequents clubs and night life. He enjoys this life too as he is never home with my kids and I. It was posted on facebook by her husband that my husband is a lucky guy because he has her. I don't wish to share a life with this man anymore as he has disrespected me and does not give me the companionship I desire. I have asked him to set me free and grant me my three talaaqs. He won't. Mufti I don't think its fair that he has best of both worlds. I realised I have sinned by asking for talaaq. What do I do to repent and what advice do you have for me on how to deal with this problem as I cannot bear to look at him. He feels like dirty trash to me.please help me.

Q: I am a revert. I have sent a question before asking about divorcing my husband. My husband is having relationships with other non muslim women. Takes them on coffee dates. Compliments them etc. I have gone to the Jamiatul ulama SA and my husband just says what they want to hear but he doesn't change his ways. They also don't follow up. Can I commit suicide? I'm tired of lies, fake Muslims and him.

Q: I have asked a question previously about my divorce. My marriage was forced and I am not happy. Other than my happiness I am afraid I am not able to fulfil my husband rights being a wife. You have instructed me to go to local mosque or scholar which is not possible for me. I can not go alone and put my question in front of anyone. What Islam says if girl is not happy with a person, I don't feel love or affection for my husband even I try a lot but then I become rude towards him. He had physical relations with a girl and other problems as well for which he said sorry. But still if I want to end this relation would that be ok? Do all marriages are like that where I don't feel anything for him, even our sex life is also very bad. Please guide me what should I do. I can not tell my family, they say we need some solid reason to end this relation. Only way of ending this relation is if I ask my husband to leave me and if I do everyone is going to attack me for this. Please tell me what is the right thing to do? Should I tell my husband even I told him many times that we are not mentally compatible and not happy in this relation but he never pay attention.

Q: I am currently studying BDS 3rd year in a private college and now I had interest to study Deen but my parent's are against it they want me to study BDS. While studying BDS I can't follow Deen because my university doesn't permit me to have a beard and to raise the lower garments above the ankle and many other issues. So please kindly help me by suggesting a right path. I am very shy to ask this question to my local Imam. Please help me as soon as possible as I am totally helpless waiting for your reply.

Q: I have a very unusual question. I am married and alhumdullilah I am blessed with 2 sons. A few years ago my dad passed away in an accident and my mom was young so we decided to get her married and we did. But her husband was not of good character and he left her after two months and my Mom came back to my house. It's more than 3 years now he did not contact her but at the same time he is not giving her divorce. We asked so many times but he always refused it. Now we have another man who wanted her to get married to him but he is not giving divorce. We can't go to court because of some legal issues. So in that case what does Islam say about women in this situation?