Advice

Q: I am a doctor by profession and the only son of my parents. Currently I am working abroad. I am married and I have one son also. After my marriage ,once I saw one tablet called "VIAGRA" that is used for prolonged sexual desire in a book of my wife who is also my first cousin. I inquired from her and informed my parents and her parents and they just told me that "some of her class mates must have put this tablet in her book". I am a doctor myself but because of my parents I ignored it. She was going to college even after marriage. In those days I was working 350 km away from my hometown and was going there 2-3 days in a week and 3 days I was at home. One day I received a call from some unknown person. He said to me "your wife is coming to college in the college van but she is not going to college. Please brother take care". I went to her collage and inquired from the principal whether my wife was present in college in the last few days. He confirmed that "she was absent for the last 7 days". I informed my parents as well as her parents but they told me not to tell anyone otherwise it will be a stigma for our family etc. Anyhow I compromized again. After that incident, one night she ran away from my home and I caught her mobile phone with all the private chats with some fellow. The next morning she came to her parents home and demanded her mobile phone to contact her boyfriend. Even then, because of insistance of my mother, I lived with her. Allah gave me a beautiful son, Alhamdolilah. The same year I got a visa for Maldives and I am working here. I kept my wife in Maldives while she was pregnant as my mother was insisting to keep her along with me even though I was not interested because of all these things.

In short, my kid and my wife were living with me here in Maldives and I forgot all the previous things. But again I caught her with a Christian fellow who is a teacher and living near my quarters. I got all the proofs also that they were having sexual relationship with each other from their chat. He wrote "do u remember that night u were creating sounds and we did sex in different positions etc". After this incident, I sent her safely to Pakistan and did'nt talk to her nor kept any kind of relationship with her even though she was living in my home. When I went for vacation for 14 days, I was sleeping in another room. Again my parents are insisting that live with the girl but I dont want to.

One more thing "She never ever accepted her mistake even after getting caught by me".

Secondly, alhamdolilah I didn't commit any zina or kept any sort of relationship with any other female. From her chats I've come to know that because of her family she is living with me otherwise she doesn't want to live with me. What reply should I give my parents. If I say that I don't want to live with her, they will not feel good. What should I do? 

Q: My parents and the girls parents are arranging a marriage. I heard about the girl that she is characterless but I don't have proof for this. Should I marry her or not?

Q: I love a guy and he even loves me. And our family knows eachother from a long time. We hadn't been involved in any haram actions. We wanted to begin with halal relationship. So he asked at his home about marrying me. But his family members denied as saying we don't like her. He is an orphan, he has a brother, sister, sister in law, brother in law, all of them refused. He tried alot. So we have done istekhara, still it's not overworking and his family said that if you marry her, then do not speak with us and there is lot of emotional blackmail. So he said he loves his family alot and as he doesn't have parents they are my world and he said no.

Meanwhile I got a rishta and that rishta is going smoothly without any hurdles. And my parents all others are happy except me. And the process has almost reached the end. The boy wants me to get married within 10 days. They are in a hurry and my parents too are in a hurry.

I would like to ask if the response of the first boy negative because since this rishta has been sent, everything is going smoothly and almost everything is final now. Can I still pray to Allah to make me the first boys life partner since I love him alot. 

Q: I am a hacker, but I do not want to use my skills for bad. May I use the remaining unused power of a person's computer (without his permission) to help do some calculations and give half of any profits to charity?

Q: From the first day of my college I started talking to a girl in my class. We met everyday and talked about many things. We also chatted on the phone. Days passed and she opened up about her personal life. Her parents got divorced when she was in 4th grade. After 2 years her mother passed away. She's the only child of her parents. After that she was adopted by her maternal uncle and since then she's living with him and his family. We discussed about religion also and she, being a christian, I told her about Islam. College closed for 10 days for holidays. After holidays, classes started again and I started ignoring her. Whenever I see her, I try to run from her. I don't even look at her. But today, while I was sitting in the corner of the class, she came up to me and said: "Why are you ignoring me? Did you forget about me?" and she went away. I felt that she was hurt. What should I do? I try my best not to get emotionally attached to someone because in the past I was hurt by getting attached to someone. As a point of sympathy... I feel that I must talk to her.Please suggest some remedy!

Q: I was in a friendship with Mr. X and was committed with him for many years and now I am engaged to him Masha Allah. Our relationship is very pious and respectaable. We never touched each other. A year before my engagement with my friend Mr. X, my affair started with Mr. Z and I had a physical relationship but there was no penetration. I was cheating on my friend Mr. X. Finally I realized my mistake and now I have left Mr. Z.... My fiance, Mr. X got this information from different people about my past affair and asked me but I refused to accept it. I repent for my sin daily but I don't want to hurt my fiance nor do I want to cheat on him. One thing is for sure that he will not leave me even after I accept my sin in front of him but I don't want to hurt him for his whole life.

What should I do now? Should I tell him truth before marrying him? I don't have courage to face him

Secondly, will Allah forgive me ? Is there any kaffara of my sin? My marriage is planned after 3 months. 

Q: I am looking to get married. I am a 25 year old male. I recently went to see a girl and everything about her was good and I feel inclined to accepting her. From her end it is positive too. The only area which is causing me confusion is that although she wears a hijab that covers her hair, neck etc, she does not wear the full abaya. Is this permissible? Would it be permissable for me to marry her if this is the case. I am planning on having another meeting with her in her house in the meanwhile to clarify some more issues and will also ask if she intends to wear one, she did mention that she wants someone to marry who will encourage her in terms of deen. I have also been performing istikhara for over a week and it is all good except doubts on the above question. In my family there is no one that wears the abaya or niqaab, but my mum does wear hijab. I am also trying to encourage my sisters to wear one. 

Q: If my husband tells me to pray only the fard and not the sunnah salaahs, do I have to pray only the fard?

Q: I have been married for a few years and have children. When the wedding talk was happening, my in laws to be were told that my dad married twice and has children with both wives. They reacted negatively and almost used this reason to stop the talk. Due to their negative reaction, I didn't disclose that my mother was married before and has two children from her previous marriage. But after the wedding I only told my husband. Now, I'm scared of telling my in laws as they are very old fashioned and traditional. I am still in contact with my half-siblings (I'm sure their feeling are hurt by this). What is the Islamic ruling in this situation. I have no secrets from my husband.

Q: When I was a teenager I liked a boy who was very religious and knowledgeable both generally and islamically, So I told about this boy to my family. And we got engaged. He saw me once. And he liked me a lot since then. We talked very rarely and it’s only about our marriage preparations. But we couldn’t get married that year so he flew abroad for his studies. I haven’t heard any news from him since then. And I waited for the holidays so he will comeback. I believed I was engaged. But then I heard from one of his relative’s sister that he nullified the engagement and I didn’t know what the reason was behind. I got many proposals at the same time from religious students of Islamic knowledge backgrounds. But yet I found very uncomfortable to accept other proposals. Because it hurts me a lot and a lot. Though I haven’t had any premarital relationship with him, but I don’t know I liked him very much and his personalities. I mailed him because I want to know what the reason was behind, and told him it would be very difficult for me to get married with some other, because I liked him very much. But I didn’t hear from him. So I accepted one of his friend’s proposals and got married. but the i heard from one of my friends that he was quite upset for letting me go. (my friend knw this from her husband) I tried so hard to forget about that boy but yet I find so uncomfortable with those feelings. My husband knows my past because he was a close friend of him. But my husband didn’t know what I’m going through with the pain inside my heart. I don’t want to ruin my life for a person who had no interest in me. I prayed Allah a lot to help me to forget him. And I tried my best to give my husband’s rights. But sometimes I get upset for knowing the boy I liked was more knowledgeable and a hafiz unlike my husband. The boy also got married one of my friends, and I feel how lucky she was although I make dua for them whenever shaitan used to whispers me. I fight with these uncomfortable feelings so hard for nearly 4 years of my marrige but sometimes I feel weak. Please advice me to get out from this pain.