Those situations where Talaaq takes place

Q: If the wife asked the husband for talaq and the husband, in a joking way said that I give you 3 talaq. He was not serious, in a funny way he said that I give you 3 talaq. So will it be talaq?

Q: If someone performs black magic on a married couple for the husband to divorce the wife and the husband divorces her, then is this divorce valid?

Q: Unfortunately we grew up in a time when our Islamic knowledge was very limited, hence it lead to a lot of mistakes and sins that we have committed. One being in question is that when we got married we followed the kaafir law of COP not realising and understanding the concept. Today it brings up alot of complications. Living in our country it is very difficult. People have advised us that the only way to rectify this is through an English divorce at the court. I am very afraid of this as the law of talaaq is not a simple issue and I don't want to live in sin and regret. Can Mufti Saheb please advise me on this.

Q: If a man is forced to divorce his wife and does it unwillingly, is it a valid divorce from Islam's perspective? 

Q: My husband told me divorce two times with the time difference is one year. He told me divoce one time and again after one year he told me one time divorce total two times. My nikah nama name is _________ but when he told me divorce he said my sencond name my nick name. So our relation is finished or not?

Q: My wife and I had an argument. I went to the bathroom to do wudu. In my mind I was thinking of her abusive words and imagining we are sitting with a family regarding our fighting in future. And she is using same abusive words. In answer to that in my mind I was saying "Mei tumhe". That was just in my mind. Then in this absent minded state, right after I uttered "Talaq deta hun". I held my tongue realizing what just happened with slip of tongue. I never even had intention of pronouncing this word. I can swear by anything that I did not even have intention of pronouncing it. But it happened with absent minded slip of tongue while thinking/imagining about it in future. Please let me know if one talaq counted.

Q: I want to ask about the procedure of divorce. Please note that I am ahle hadees and my wife and whole family are Hanafi.

Q: Please explain what the masla is in regards to the talaaq of a معتوه person with daleel.

Q: One of my cousins wants to ask you that when she was watching a comedy drama on tv with her husband, in the drama one men said to his wife, talaq talaq talaq talaq. Many times my cousin's husband used to repeat the words from the tv drama while they were watching. When he heard the word talaaq, he turned to his wife and launghed then he said to her talaq talaq talaq. He said that he had no intention of divorce, does divorce take place?

Q: 3 days ago my husband gave me a divorce in one message by saying that as per your wish, talaq talaq talaq... And you are free from my side. But I have my periods in these days. Someone told me that when a wife is not in taharat, talaq cannot tak eplace and she gave me a refrence of Hazrat Umar (radhiyallahu anhu), that once he gave talaq to his wife in anger, and when he asked Hazrat Muhammad (sallallahu alaihi wasallam), he said wait for her to become pure then you can give her a divorce if you want to... kindly guide me.