Q:
1. I used to make sincere tawba but now a days I cannot make tawba because I do it repeatedly.. Such as I touch Ayah during hayez unintentionally but there is no other choice as I read islamic books and ayah is always there even in siratun nabi.. Should I stop reading books?
2. I want to have good akhlaq but I have bad temper and low self esteem.. How to have good akhlaq and a clean heart?
3. I want to give dawah but I don't get correct words or the confidence to give dawah..
4. I want to be with correct people ma shaa Allah I go to talim they are always in a spirit to help.. But I want to avoid backbiting there is no such place where there is no backbiting and negativity and I also try to read books but there is always contradiction.I started reading Naim Siddiqui's book on our Prophet but his thinking was kind of political. Should I read this kind of writer's books?
5. After listening to a lecture of Maulana Tariq Jamil I used to make dua in my mind before salam in namaz, sometimes I took more time than the tasbeeh is my salah valid?
6. Sometimes I feel Allah is not helping such as I said Bismillah wala barakatullah with belief that there will be baraqah but the rice got overcooked and my mother complained that it caused her stomach disease ,I wanted a blessed ramadan the first two days tarawih was invalid and I suffered so much waswasa I had to make wudu 10 11 times.. I started to wear full niqab the next very day something happen that never happened when I didn't put niqab.. I wanted to hide and go to another room in order to do parda but all the rice dal fall on the floor in front of everybody.. What is the explanation behind these.. I am trying to please Allah!
7. When I am on my period how should I do aamal? Should I do the zikir which I use to do after every salah?
8. I want to be in a routine but I always fail to do so.. Please tell me what a good Muslim's routine should be..
Please make dua for me and my husband (may be he is trying to become a good muslim but his environment is not deeni) and my family..
A:
1. Read the books, but don't touch the spot where the aayat is written.
2. Don't do anything without thinking. Understand what you are doing first and thereafter see if you are conforming to the teachings of the hadeeth.
3. Join the tableegh jamaat; they will teach you.
4. Continue joining the ta`leem and don't participate in discussions. When anybody starts of don't join. You may study a kitaab under the guidance of some pious learned elder. For the time being, you may start off with Faazaa'il-e-A`maal and Fazaa'il-e-Sadaqaat.
5. The namaaz of the past are valid, but don't repeat this. You need to do the du`aa verbally.
6. Don't entertain unnecessary doubts and suspicion. Barkat can comes in different ways. Don't restrict it to one particular manner.
7. Yes.
9. Commence with the following daily program at home for at least 15 minutes in the mornings and evenings:
(1) Ta`leem of Fazaa'il-e-A`maal, Fazaa'il-e-Sadaqaat and Bahishti Zewar.
(2) Recitation of a portion of the Qur'aan Shareef and some zikr.
(3) Du`aa at the end of each session.
And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
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