Q: Who is responsible from both parents to assist a baligh boy who is mentally challenged, to assist him in shaving, scrubbing and bathing. He is 24, but looks like a 14 year old. His hands cannot reach out to even wash himself in the toilet, hasn't got flexible fingers to use properly.
The mother does everything as the father shows very little or no interest. Please advise.
She doesn't mind taking care of her son, but also wants the father to share in the reward Allah will grant, in sha Allah.
A: Both are responsible for taking care of him. As far as istinja or bathing him is concerned, then the father should take charge of this without looking at the private parts or touching with his bare hands when washing or cleaning him. He may use a glove or a cloth to clean him. Similarly, hair removing creams may be used to remove the unwanted hair.
And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
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