Advice

Q: How to deal with a husband who regularly disobeys Allah and gets angry when wife reminds him to stop bad habits?

Q: I have been married for 4 years now and have 2 young boys. For the last year or so my husband has continually told me and the boys that he doesn't have money. He will always ask them when are they moving out because they are making him bankrupt. We do not have luxuries like a TV or even a lounge suite. We live a simple live. I do not work & my husband earns a very good salary. I don't ask my husband for anything not even a mop. I clean on my hands & knees as we can not afford a maid. Of recent I have become irritated with my husband's constant banter about not having money. The problem is that my husband has got 3 houses. 2 have bonds on it. 1 is being rented out 4 just under its repayment. The other bonded 1 we live in. The other house his family stays in. His mother, his older brother & his younger brother & his new wife. They all live in the house for free! My father in law lives elsewhere & my mother in law does not want 2 stay with her husband. My husband's older brother only works part time jobs. Is it wrong of me to ask my husband to sell that house or ask 4 reasonable rent? By his family staying there & not paying rent is making me lie awake at night as my husband has got 4 kids that he has to put through school. (He has 2 kids from a previous marriage) I feel that the older brother must go & work & that the newly married brother should get a place of his own & that my mother in law should go & stay with her husband or her daughter that I'd married to a wealthy man. I have requested talaaq from my husband as he does not think that this is an issue. I feel that my husband, the kids & I are at a disadvantage due to my husband's 'good-heartedness' We live on my husband's overdraft. If he sells the 2 houses we can be bond free & overdraft free. Am I being selfish?

Q: One question. My parents have started to drift apart for the past 3 years. My dads mother is very controlling over him and causes fitna. My dad
is a very obedient son and does so much for his parents. He has had troubling balancing doing for his parents and doing for his wife, my mom. Due to this he has not been able to give much attention to my mother. Over the past year my mother and father stopped caring enough to try to get that connection back. My mother is unhappy and wants a divorce. I am devastated and keep telling them to work on it and my mother says she doesn't have it in her to try at all anymore. She says she is repelled now and does not have any feelings left. I suggested Islamic marriage counseling and that idea was quickly dismissed. What is the Islamic outlook on this and what is Islamic advice and suggestions?

Q: Humble request for advice regarding the following:

An elderly family member recently forwarded me and other members the following email. I would like to know if I should advise him to renew his Kalimah. He has propagated something which casts a doubt on the fundamental beliefs of Islam. Hereunder is the message:

Q: I have been teaching in a maktab for a few years اَلْحَمْدُالَّله. However I have been late a couple a times over the years. I didn't keep record of the times I was late. I feel guilty for this khiyanat I have made. I tried to estimate the time and I calculated an approximate amount. I now want to pay back the jamaat. The issue is the jamaat doesn't want to take back the amount saying that coming late occasionally can be overlooked. I am in the employ of the jamaat and sometimes if there is a ghusal of mayyit to be done during madrassa hours I do the ghusal. Mufti Saheb do I subtract that time from madrassa time too? What would be the ruling in my case.

Q: I have been for Hajj already but the person I am taking has not, but my dad asked me to instead use that money for an additional extension to his
house. What do I do? My dad has been for hajj as well.

Q: A few days back I was just leaving home to go to masjid for salaah and my uncle (who is an Aalim) came unexpectedly with some friends to drop off a parcel. I asked him if he is coming to the masjid and he said no (They were musafir). My mother was alone in the house and none of them are her mahrams so they obviously could not be in the house while I went to masjid, so they had to drop off the parcel and leave immediately. This Aalim seemed to be upset because I went to masjid and did not accommodate them. Did I do the right thing or was I supposed to miss salaah with jamaat to accommodate them?

Q: I met a girl on facebook 2 weeks ago. We became good friends in only one day and the second day I told her that I love you. She also responded
positively but after two days I prayed namaz and I felt very guilty of myself for getting involved in such a henious practice as I had never done this before. So I told her to forget me and I cut off all the contact with her but now she is saying that you betrayed me. She regularly calls me but I don't pick up her calls. I only left that girl for the sake of Allah. Please help me out, have I done right or have I betrayed her really? Will I be punished for
hurting her? What should I do now? Please help me mufti sahb.

Q: My sex desire is finished. Therefore my marriage is about to end. I am feeling very tired day by day.