Advice

Q: I pray you can help I'm desperate for some direction. Me and my husband both work. I earn more than him. His family lives in another country.  His father works but has a lot of debts to pay off. Me and my husband have been married for a year only so we don't have much savings. He pays the mortgage and I pay the bills. We cannot save much.  He asked me if we could send his family £500 a month. I wanted to send less as we have just got married and need to save. But he got angry so I agreed to £500 a month to send to his family. He promised me that if in any given month we were short on money or we wanted to spend on us for example buying furniture then he would not send his family £500 for that month. He promised me we would only send them money if we were able to every month. We have been sending them £500 a month for many months now. We are planning to have a child. I will have to stop working in a few months. We can't live off his pay only so we need to save some money for when I'm not working. Also our house is furnished with old furniture from my parents house. Last week we went furniture shopping. My husband was reluctant to buy anything. He told me he didn't think we should spend on furniture because he wants to give his dad. £1000 for a visa to visit us. I got upset because we only have £3000 in our savings and we need to save for when I have a baby. He got angry that I said no and we had a fight. It's my money too that I earned so I felt I had the right to say no especially when we send £500 a month already. Anyway this month we do not have much money to spend and buy much food. We are living penny to penny. We have £3000 in our savings but we are not touching that because we will need it when I fall pregnant. So this month we couldn't afford to send his dad £500. But now he wants to take £500 out of our savings to send to his dad. I feel hurt because he knows we are living penny to penny this month so we don't eat into our savings but now he wants to send £500 to his dad? He gets paid at the end of the month I told him to send it then. But he got angry and said he will send another £500 then! I'm worried he isn't thinking about the fact that in a few months I won't be earning and we will rely on his income only which isn't even enough to pay the bills so it's important that we save now. I don't mind sending his dad money when we are able to. I feel cheated. He promised me he wud only send his parents money if we have enough money too, but I feel he prefers us to struggle so he can send them money. Am I wrong? Please please advice as I don't want to do anything islamically wrong.

Q: I want to clear my confusion about certain issues of my married life. I have recently married. Before my marriage I was doing a graceful job. The reason for working was to eliminate my dependency on my parents and to support my studies which I did side by side of my job. Soon after my education completion my parents associated me with one of my family cousins in family. At the time of engagement the boy and his family were fully aware that I am a working lady. The mean time when we remained engaged they did not cleared the stance weather I will continue my job after marriage on not. After marriage my husband went to Saudi Arabia for job and left me here and we agreed that meantime he completes the formalities and documentation from Saudi Arabia, I shall carry on my job. Its been 6 months that we got married my husband did not care for my nafaqah and whenever I claim he tells me that I am earning money and he has some other things to spend on and refuses to pay or even becomes angry and threatens me with divorce. He forces me to spend my earnings on his brother's family and have taken huge amounts for his degree fees too. I was doing all of it for him thinking in my mind that soon I'll move to Saudi Arabia soon. But I have realised that he does not acknowledge my efforts and contribution I made. At the end of the day he says I have not done anything for him and he don't need my job and forces me to resign immediately. I am in a fix if I would stop working he will not pay me anything. How will I survive? I cannot ask my parents to support me. If I don't quit my job he threatens me off and on during quarrel on some other things to resign immediately. Please guide me in the light of Islam about my rights and obligations.

Q: A young girl is due to give birth anytime inshallah. After birth she's set to go to her parents home for her confinement. Now she receives the news that her parents will be going out in masturaat jamaat. This young girl was sad and depress and pleaded for them not to go now and may be go on another occasion but they would not listen. When they will be away the girls aunties and sister will take care of her. There family members are from other towns though, causing them to leave their respected husbands and children to take care of her needs. Will this be correct or what should be done?

Q: Please give me some wazifa or surah of quran which I can read for the return of our visa paper. We sent it 8 months before but we have not received any reply. We sent those papers for extension.

Q: I am a hanafi. Is it allowed for me to marry someone who does not follow a mazhab? If it is allowed won't this later become a problem when we have children in terms of teaching them how to pray etc?

Q: Please advise some dua for me for the following question: We are getting some work done to our house and having lot of issues getting the work done. 

Q: I have done inter last year with average marks. Eight months have passed and I haven't got admission in university. I have done 6 to 7 tests but I have not qualified. What is the reason. I am very upset. Please answer.

Q: I am 18 years old. Till today I don't have knowledge of shariat and what are kabeera and sageera gunah. I came to know a little about this 5 month ago when some of tablighi jamaat members contacted me and taught me about I slam and sunnat and now I offer prayers also. My family is far from shariat and sunnat. Although all of us pray 5 times a day and also recite holy quraan but none of us acts on sunnat and  we are not aware of what life our prophet (Sallalalahu Alayhi Wasallam) led and which a'maal will lead us to jahannum and which to jaanat and even if we are aware of it we don't practice it in our life. I try to lead an Islamic life and also had grown a sunnat beard and also wear topee and avoid jeans and tight and fashionable dress but my family says that you have much life to practice these things. But for now just concentrate on your studies. Recently I got selected in mbbs entrance exam but I am not happy with my life because I want to devote my whole life to Islam so that I can practice Islam myself and also spread it to others. The problem is that my parents and whole family is against It. They don't want me to leave worldly studies and go for Islamic studies but if I did not get islamic studies and complete my goal then I am afraid of getting stressed and mad. Kindly guide me as soon as possible.

Q: I have received your email today and was referred to the following link http://muftionline.co.za/node/2704. I want to know for how long should I continue my wazifa?

Q: How can I encourage my husband to perform his 5 times salaah and properly? My husband does not make his salaah properly, he makes it so fast. I fear that his salaahs aren't even accepted. Please help. If his salaahs aren't accepted does that make him a kaafir?