advice

Marital problems

Q: Nowadays I am quite worried. Please tell me what steps should I take to make my life normal.

I live in pakistan, where when you get married, people think that now you are their servant. I have graduated in software engineering but my husband dont allow me to work. I understand he is my husband and he can give me orders. But my problem is that his parents also think that they are my responsibility. His mother's attitude is not good with me from the time I got married. His mother says that there is nothing appreciatable or good in me, I am ugly and dont do any thing good. Although my relatives say thay I am good looking. I am telling you this so that you can understand that she hurts me and insults me and expects that I have to serve her. Last time my mother in law said that if I cannot do what she says then I have to stay in my parents home just because I made bread dough with my own recipe not like what she said. Along with other household chores she wants me to even iron her and her husband cloths. Although I have the responsibility of my husband and a daughter. My main issue is their behaviour and their insults. Now I am at my parents home and I refuse to go back to my in laws home. I have asked my husband that I will only go back if he will take me and his mother to some mufti so that the mufti could tell that his parents that they are not my responsibility. Maybe in this way their attitude will change. But my husband refused so now I'm in my parents home. Do you think what I have done is right? Please tell me what I should do? Because I have lost all my self respect for my husband and in laws . Still they are not happy. They have made me hate myself. Please tell me if my husband can force me to serve his parents?

Being concerned about the Deen of a female family member

Q: If a Muslim woman,who is married and having kids, does not offer namaaz and never do other mandatory practices and she doesn't have basic knowledge of Islam, although she is an educated woman and she never shows her interest in Islamic knowledge. So what is the way to let her on the right path. Who will be in charge to let her back to right path or who's responsible?

Maintaining ties with one's mother

Q: I have not seen my mother for 15 years. Now I am 20 years old. There was a problem between my dad and mom as my mother a had a habit of robbing and it was very embarrassing. There was huge fight between dad and mom and So she left the house and went away. All these years I was living without her. But I recently got to know that she is Saudi Arabia. What should I do? Should I tell my dad or not because he hates her and the second thing is should I contact her? I am confused my heart says I should but I don't know what to say.

Father leaving wife and children without any financial support

Q: If a father left his wife and kids out of the country for two years without any financial support and after 2 years suddenly come back, what will they do with him? Should they join again or stay far away from him? The wife is seriously fed up with her husband because he had done this 5 times before and bothered his family by not financially supporting themafter leaving. His family faced very very difficult situations.

How should a wife deal with her husband who watches porn?

Q: I have seen many women complain on social platforms that their husbands watch porn and I've seen people comment that they should divorce or try and help them with it. What exactly would be the Islamic way of dealing with it? Should she advise him against it, then if he carries on, leave him to go to her parents house for a while and inform him that she would be willing to fulfill his rights at any part of the day in any way permissible in Islam as long as it does not break the rules of Islam and then if he agrees and asks her to come back home should she go back and only divorce if he repeatedly does it again?

Husband cheating with sister-in-law

Q: If my husband and sister in law had a najaiz relationship when we were downstairs and he was sleeping. (Maybe) She came in the room and stayed for fifteen minutes when we were in England. What can I do so that she stays away from him and he doesn't look at her because she is making him with magic. What can I read that no one can came between us?