Q: Mike jahni pareshani hai mai apna shoour bahut kam mahsoos karta hu dil Mar chuka hai Jin Ke shakal dikti hai aakh khud KO nahi dekh pati namaz aur Darood Sharif padhta hu liken maksad nahi milta Dono aakho Ke bich Ke jisse mai mahsoos kar chuka ho vaisa hi phir karna chata hu liken gagil dil rahta hai up doun chalta rahta hai bas jinda dil chata hu Karam farmaye.
Q: There are many madarasahs running in my locality. Specially those teaching kids. The ladies running the madarasa are too violent on kids. 3 year old kids, not even able to speak properly are asked to keep records of their prayers, and when these kids skip a prayer, mostly fajar, complaining that our mother didn't wake up us, the lady says that it's your responsibility to wake up not your mothers, and slap the kids so badly that their cheeks turn red and they begin crying. These ladies use dusting stick to hit on the kids palm so violently that the kids burst in tears. In case, when the kids could not memorise the lesson allocated to them yesterday, the ladies turn their ears in such a way that it's tongue comes out and the ear goes red and the kid cry aloud. Because of the crowd of kids, the lady running the madarasa has appointed other young girls to teach the very young and these girls are even more violent. In one of the madarasa the girl complaining that I couldn't wake up because my mother didn't wake me up was asked to pray 10 nafil to compensate the loss. They behave very badly with kids. Is it permissible to do this kind of violence in teaching Quran? Please support your views with AHaadith. What should I do being in the locality?
Q: Does a wife have to obey her husband if he tells her she can't read istikhara? My husband insists that we live with his parents and unmarried brothers. I have told him that I cannot live there anymore as it is too stressful and besides my room and bathroom I have no privacy. Even when my room door is closed one can still hear us talking etc. From outside the room and even downstairs. We have 2 children and they both sleep in the room with us. My husband and I have been have many marital issues and I eventually left and went back to my parents home because I could not manage living there and I could not take his behavior towards me anymore. He told me that it is haram that I left. I wanted to read istikhara about whether I should go back but he has forbidden me to. Is this correct?
Q: I have been married twice before and have three children. I am living back with my parents (mom and brother) since earlier this year, but work and see to the kids for everything excluding rent to stay. I am having a hard time coping financially. I would like to remarry but my brother (my father has passed on some years ago) thinks it is too soon and will not meet the man that has put the proposal forward. My question is do I need consent from my brother and or mother?
Q: Is there any basis for these advices and will it be preferable to follow it:
Deeds or foods that weaken the memory
1. Sins.
2. Sour Apples.
3. Vinegar.
4. All those things that cause phlegm.
5. Moist Coriander.
6. Salted meat.
7. Hot bread.
8. Eating from a pot.
9. The leftover drink of a rat.
10. Reading tombstones.
11. Witnessing a crucifixion.
12. Looking at stagnant water.
13. Looking at one’s own private parts.
14. Looking at the private parts of a woman.
15. Masturbation.
16. For a person in need of a fard bath to look at the sky.
17. Looking into the mirror of a cupper (one who does cupping).
18. Using a broken comb.
19. Urinating in stagnant water.
20. Urinating on the side of the road.
21. Urinating under a fruit tree.
22. Urinating into ash.
23. Making wudhu in an impure place.
24. Wiping the hands or face with the tail of the clothing/kurta/qamis etc.
25. Entering the Masjid with the left foot or leaving with the right.
26. Dusting clothes in the Masjid.
27. Sweeping with a cloth.
28. Using a pants or turban as a pillow.
29. Excessive joking.
30. Laughing in the graveyard.
31. Excessive worries of the world.
32. Cupping on the nape.
33. Throwing of live lice.
References for the above Al-Mu’jamul Kabir of Tabarani, Kitabul ‘ilm of Ibn Abi Khaithamah, pg.31, Al-Jami’u li akhlaqir rawi, pgs.400 & 404, Ta’limul Muta’allim pg. 43, Al-Maqasidul Hasanah pg. 519, Tazhkiratu Sami’ Wal Mutakallim pg. 77, At-tibb of Imam Dhahabi, pgs.174-175 & Raddul Muhtar.
Q: I did zina today and I did it for the first time and I do accept my mistake and I prayed to Allah and asked for forgiveness but my heart is not calming down and I can't even forgive myself. I am just crying. I don't know but kindly help me about how I ask for forgiveness from Allah. Kindly help me. I am truly ashamed of myself.
Q: Is it ok for a husband to go on numerous holidays with his friends leaving his family behind? His argument is he provides and takes family too.
Q: I am a 22 year old female. Two years back an alliance was fixed for me. They told us to wait for two years till his younger sister gets married. Everyone in my family accepted. But now after waiting for two years that's boys mother and sister are making problems trying to stop the marriage. His sister is also not accepting any alliance for her. Please help me to change his mother's and sisters mind. After waiting for two years they are trying to cheat us now.
Q: Mera sawal aap sai yai hai ke meri behan ko pichlai 10 sai 15 deen ho gai hai unhai khushboo aati hai aur khushboo saath mai honai ka ahesas bhi hota hai sirf taharat yani toilet kai wakt khushboo nahi aati. Office jatai waqt jahan par office hai waha bhi khushboo aati hai. Neend mai kisi kai maar ka ahesas peacock kai feather ki maar jaisa hota hai. Please aap batana ki yai kya hai unhai khuch seen pehlai khawab mai jeen nazar aaya him ghar kai afraad eak toota ghar mai nazar aayai aur keen bhahar sai andar jhankta hai aur jeen kai haato mai camera jaisa deekhai daita hai Jo daikh raha hai. Please hamai zarurat hai batana meri sister thodi praishan hai job par tawajja nahi ho pa rahi hai.
Q: Should a person cut relations and move away from parents and other close relations if he or she is being made to feel isolated because of failure to adhere to the societal norm of free mixing? The individual in question feels that he is being an inconvenience at gatherings. Family feel compelled to make separate seating arrangements, which due to their habit of free mixing they can't keep to. In addition even on the rare occasions when complete segregation is adhered to the social gathering contains useless talk, which leads to gheebat. If the individual in question addresses this issue in the only way that he knows, then he is regarded as either being a spoil sport, breaking hearts or even mentally unwell. His family regard themselves as deendar but their Deeni talks ironically take place whilst brother in laws and sister in laws are sitting in the same gathering. This brother is now beginning to feel depressed and isolated and the only way out seems to be move away from everybody. Is this a reasonable course of action to take in this particular situation?