advice

Saas ki taraf se pareshaaniya

Q: Mujhe pochna tha ke meri 2 betiyan hain Alhamdulillah nere bache buhat chote hain abhi or meri saas mere sath rehti hain or wo har bat ma kehti hain ye mera haq ha mere bachon ko jo bat wo batati hain mere bache meri bat nai sunte or mujhe poche bagair wo mere bachon ko bahir lejati hain kbi meri nand ke ghar bhejdeti hain or mere husband b kuch nai kehte ulta mujhe he chup karate rehte hain ma bht pareshan ai hui hun kia dadi ka haq bachon pe zayada ha maa se har waqt mere bacho ke samne khti ha tum log dressing achi karo mama se bolo ke tum ye dress nai pehnugy or agr ma dant don bachon ko tu kehti hain tum se bache nai sambhale jate apne kamre ma mere bachon ko lejati hain or ma kuch nai karsakti itni bebasi kia ye islam ha ke wo itne aram ma beta k ghr ma or beti ke ghr k kareb rehti jo chahe karti ha Allah ne apna ghr driver sab diya ha or ek or beta ha par phr b mere or mere bachon ke peche pari ha tang achuki hun ma unse mere hsband tu bs job pe hote ha ya computer pe bethe rehte hain namaz parhne chalejate hain ya khelne chalejate hain humare upar apni maa ko chor dete hain ye kesi neki kamani hui unki waja se kai bar mere husbnd se b larai hui kia ma apne bachon ko kuch keh nai sakti unko dosro k ghr jane se ruk nai sakti ma kia karo mere bache hain ma unse buhat pyar karti hun Allah meri madad karde plz bataye ma kia karun wo apne dosre bete ke pass kio nai jati jab ke wo akela ha usk b neighbour ma uski behan rehti ha ye kio nai jati usk pas... koi hal ha kia is bat ka?

Difficulty in practising on one's deen in the country one is residing in

Q: My question is that I came to KSA from Karachi two months back to my parents and I don't like it here at all. I am 23 years old and I lived all my life in Pakistan. I am used to the lifestyle of Pakistan. I tried to compromise and live here but I can't anymore! I pray regularly Alhumdulelah and believe that only Allah Ta'ala can help me. But my parents are not thinking about me. I didn't eat for 5 days but they're not bothered. They're giving excuses that we spent so much money to bring you here and now you want to go. I collected my money for exit visa and ticket also so that I don't burden them. I have my home back in Karachi and my elder brother lives there too. It is no problem if I go live there but my parents are making it a problem. I hav faith that if Allah wills, He can help me. No one else can stop me then! But sometimes I become weak and feel like committing suicide so that they can save their money properly! I am afraid I might do something wrong with myself.

Difficulties and problems

Q: Myself my husband we both are very nice people. We are always on the helping side. We are not jealous, very simple and clear hearted people. But recently we got very big loss in our properties and we also give out accurate zakat as mentioned in the Qur'an. So what is the reason we face so many problems?

Making a thorough investigation before making a decision

Q: I had indented to marry a lady then during our conversation after couple of months before nikaah I came to know that she is greedy and I fear that she would do the way she likes to do and will not listen to me because I believe she is a professional excusor. I strongly feel that this marriage will not work. I refused once then through a third person we sorted out and tried to re-continue. Now again I am feeling the same situation. Should I go with this marriage or not? I am confused. My family says in this country you don't know people are very different. That lady was married before and got divorce from her husband in a couple of weeks. Please guide me. She said she did istkhara and it was ok. I did but got nothing, no feeling etc. still same.

Family criticizing one for wearing hijaab

Q: I'm a 19 year old from Pakistan. Two years ago I started to wear the hijab and the burqa. My mother passed away when I was 9 and so I look up to my aunt for all the girly stuff. Everyone admired me when I started wearing the head cover and the burqa except my aunt. According to her I'm overdoing it; she gave me her example that she wears the hijab and burqa when shes driving alone, but she doesn't wear it when she is out with her husband ( her husband does not like hijab at all) she does not even wear the head cover in public gatherings or parties where the place is filled with non-mahrams. According to her, this is neutral and the way it is supposed to be. I wear hijab anywhere I go and do not take it off no matter what and she knows that too. She claims that I wear hijab just for looking cool. Wallahi I wear hijab for the sake of Allah and to please my Lord. And then she asks me to wear hijab in some other ' appealing style ' which requires me to raise the backside of my head and to reveal my forehead. My aunt used to wear burqa and hijab when she used to work. I also want to practise the niqab because I don't like the way how men eat up a woman by their stares and they do not spare a woman whose in hijab and burqa. But she says that I'm not religious enough to practise it. My other aunty calls me a 'laloo kheti' ( a term used in urdu to define a person who belongs from the lower class). I am really heart broken. My confidence is shaken. Why do people say stuff to me like that. I wear hijab the way it is supposed to be. It covers the bossom. And it covers my forehead as well. Please help me. And she also claims that I don't want you two sisters to have such an appalling difference (my sister who is 13 doesn't cover her head and hardly carries a duppatta and prefers to untie her hair every time) my aunt likes the way how my sister carries herself and she says that I look outdated in front of her and that shouldn't be the way. Please help me sir.

Shaadi se pehle zina karna

Q: Mera sawal ye hai ke agr biwine shaddi de se phale sex kar chuki hai ek se ziyada afrad ke sath wo bhi anginat martaba aur shaddi ke bad agr wo apne shohar se iske bareme batati hai to use nikha me rakhna chaye ya nahi rakhna chaiye ya fir talq dena chaiye? Aur abhi bhi us ka dil jise zina kiya us me thoda bahot atka huwa hai jise ke sath zina kiya sabo ki shaddi hogaye hai aur unko ek se do bacce bhi hai. Aise halat me kya kare meharbani karke baye Shariyat kya hukum deti hai is bareme? Mai mere bhai ki pareshani aur nahi dekhsakta.

Respect for parents

Q:

1. A girl is unable to love her father because he hurts her feelings, will she be accountable for not loving him?

2. After marriage girl should give importance for her parents or husband's parents?

3. A girl is happy in her husband's house because her in laws treats her well than her own parents. So naturally girl starts loving her in laws more than her parents will she be accountable before Allah for not giving so much of love for own parents? Please note that this girl had to suffer emotionally while she was at her parent's home due to some of the behaviour of her parents.

4. Will we be accountable in the court of Allah if we have little hatred for someone because that person used to hurt our feelings through his/her words or behaviour?

Abu bohot gussa karty hai

Q: Mere Abu bahut gussa karty hai her baat pe jagda kerte hai hum sister's ko job karne nahi dete hum pe zulm karty hai humare ammi pe bhi bahut zulm karty hai. Humari 2 sisters ko already village mein shadi kera ya aur ab humari bhi shadi village mein karana chahta hai abu bahut zulm karta hai hum 3 sister's pe aur ami pe bhi ab huamara future bhi barbad kerna chahta hai. Please bhai aap log meri madad ki jiye mujhe ek taweez durood ya koi wazifa dejiye jes se meri abu sudhar jaye humare khuwahisho ko samjhe hum pe zulm na kare aalh aap logo ko jannat al ferdos naseeb karega bas aap log meri madad karo.