Advice

Cheating on one's wife

Q: I cheated with my wife by sleeping with another women. My wife came to know about it. She says if I say it's true then she wants talaaq. Should I lie to her that it's not true and continue with our marriage or should I tell her the truth.

Correcting one's intention

Q: I was wondering what would happen if a person for example buys a book with riya, but then makes tawbah and then uses it sincerely for only Allah Ta'ala? What happens in these situations when someone tries to follow Deen but he has corruption in his intention but later fixes it. Will he get reward for it?

Losing concentration and composure in Salaah

Q: I have a mental disability where I have psychosis, ocd, and split personality disorder. Sometimes in my Salaah it is not within my control to control the peace of mind and thus my ustaad ruled that for me, being in a state of peace or not does not count for me and my salaah will be fine. My question is, I sometimes do my Salaah when I am at peace but I mistakenly make the mistake of being not calm due to my illness. What should I do in this case with the Salaah that I have ruined in terms of I had already had peace in my mind and intentionally by accident got not peaceful?

Making tawbah

Q: Five years ago when I was 13 years old we went abroad. My sister was 11 years old and we were considered as kids and therefore shared 1 room and slept on 2 beds combined together and had one blanket. I at that point of time knew nothing about zina and all these thing related to zina indeed I barely knew anything as I was 13. I didn't want to go to school in grade 5 as it was a new school so I would cry at night but silently and once when everybody was sleeping I was awake as I didn't want to go to school and I got this weird feeling about opposite gender and bear in mind i knew nothing. So my sister was sleeping so i put my hand inside her clothes and tried to touch her body parts but i dont think so i touched although i out my hand inside but i dont remember that i touched all her body parts but i tried and then put her hand on my main point. I hdnt intend to do it but it just happened i wonder why. After that nothing happened and i didnt have any regrets and but now after 5 years when i am 18 i have realized that i did such a bad thing and sometimes i feel very bad but then i think i was 13 wasnt a boy i was a kid i knew nothing about these things and was innocent but then i feel no matter what i shall be punished i have told my parents and they forgave me and told me to move on but i feel very bad and tensed. So maulana sb tell me is it something i will be punished for i have prayed and cried for my forgiveness and when i am tensed my mom constantly tells me to move on or satan will succeed and make you mental. She says whats done is done and you didnt do it now at the age of 18, you did it 5 years ago. And sometimes i do feel bad but then i think that boys or girls develop at the ages of 14 or 15 and girls or boys dont develop physically at the age of 11 or 13 so I then think that my sister was also small and me too plus I didnt commit zina so just forget it and just move on but then again i feel bad and tensed so maulana sb tell me what to do and is it really something that should be taken into account or that was just foolish childhood? Sir give me a detailed reply i need your help and is this tensed and bad feeling coming because of Allah or satan and i am sure that Allah will forgive me because i was innocent i knew nothing and plus i didnt have bad intentions it just happened coz i was awake and just happened once. And sometimes i feel i have ruined my sisters life and because i touched her and that i have ruined her life but then i think girls dont develop physically at the age of 11 so just forget it. My dad said just move on and forget it just happened because you were young in the sense that i was small because i didnt have wet dreams at the age of 13 i had them later and i had no physical changes in my body so just move on.

Being possessive over one's wife

Q: My question is regarding my own personality which I think is like a dual personality or I am a selfish person. I love my wife and respect her as well but when I see her speaking to family members, I feel jealous. I mean even if she is with her brothers and sisters I get upset and I get stressed. I pray five times but still my mind is at unrest. Please I need your help.

Encouraging the husband to perform Salaah

Q: My question is about that my husband does not pray regularly even if he got time. He is lazy and he get depressed in life and he can't do a proper job. He gets angry with his wife, kids and family for little things. I want to ask you that as a Muslim how many times I have to tell him to perform Salaah and practise Deen? What shall I pray or do to better my circumstance because I really want my husband and kids to be good Muslims and good Da'ees in Islam?

Maintaining family ties

Q: I am a teenager and my problem is that my maternal aunt doesn't love me. She loves my other cousins. She cares for them and shows affection towards them but she has no feelings for me. She shows little or no affection towards me. She does not like to talk to me. She gets annoyed if I sit beside her. I know that my maternal aunt has the same status as my mother and I try to uphold the ties of kinship but I feel so embarrassed by her behaviour. Please tell me what to do.