Advice

Q: Everything was going smoothly, but since a month I am in a lot of troubles. These troubles are mainly psychological. I am unable to concentrate on my studies. Rather it is like I want to study but I am unable to due to lack of determination, will power, etc. I am lost and I don't know what should I do. I waste a lot of time these days in idiotic activities. I just want to stop this but I am unable to. Please help me in this matter. If there is a dua to overcome such distress please do give me.

Q: I always think about girl everyday but my father said I must finsh my hifz first before I get married. What dua I must read everyday or what azkaar must I do. My hifz is not going well. What dua I must make everyday?

Q: I had been engaged for one year and I just talked to my fiancee on mobile and crossed every limit on mobile. She left me after one year and immediately married  her bhabi's brother . I saw her after her marriage, she came before me on call in front of her family. She said that she told her parents that she did not agree to the engagement but her mother said she is lying and her bhaabi had done black magic on her. I am very confused and upset and can't forget the talks and her.

Q: I was doing umrah last Thursday with my husband and kids. When I offering salaah in safa marwa I saw some water. That time I was not sure whether it was water or urine leaked from by daughter's diaper. But after I left haram I realized that  that was urine. I am so scared. What do I do? That urine must be touched the feet of many people in the haram. What will be my punishment. I am very scared. Please guide me.

Q: I want to ask a question about dating in Islam. I am dating a guy whom I love so dearly,we both want to get married in the future but there is a deep urge within me to be just a pious Muslim and stop all the bad things I am doing. So what I really want to know is if he and I repent to Allah and try to get engaged in the Islamic way, will Allah forgive us and accept our marriage as a lawful one in Islam. We both are pursuing our bachelor's degree and we want to wait until after that. I have been seeking answers for the past few weeks but a friend told me that the likelihood of Allah forgiving you of a sin you know is bad and still do is 0.1. So I am confused, I really need help.

Q: I personally dislike visiting restaurants/eating out, because I feel they are places of the dunya and a waste of money. However, my wife enjoys visiting restaurants and wants me to take her out to eat now and again. She agrees that we only go to places which have pardah facilities (screens), no music and reliable halaal food. Should I take my wife out to eat since this is important for her, and be thankful for the fact that she is particular with her parda and avoiding haram? Or should I follow my own feeling that eating out shows love of the dunya and is a waste of time and money, and thus refuse to take her out? If so, what alternatives can I provide her to keep her happy? My wife's background is such that she is not happy just sitting at home.

Q: I would like to know how to inculcate good manners in my children. I noticed that if I am strict and firm with them, they start screaming and crying. However, if I am lenient with them, they take advantage of me and simply ignore me. Please provide me with some guidelines on how to discipline them.

Q: I and my husband have been married for four years now with one two year old son. Before our marriage we had a love relation for ten years. As we are cousins too, we had the most beautiful relation though with few fights. Just before getting married I was studying for USMLE but my husband who was my fiance stopped me had big fights and told me to leave it and study in Pakistan whatever I want to do. Two years after our marriage I did my specialization and started working in hospital from 9 to 2. Its been last one month my husband has strong objection on not doing it and leaving it. In between our marriage we had huge fights. My husband beat me several times very brutally and things have gotten to two talaaqs because of his anger. He has not given me any money for my personal expenses only for house hold and recently he took away money from me which he gave to save and told me he will not give me money as I do job and he will deprive me of it. I came to my parents home. He came and misbehaved and abused my parents. They came to know he beats me regularly and abuses me. They told me to leave him but he apologised and said he will not do it again and let me continue my profession. As I came back with him his attitude is still the same no change in it. His parents tell him in front of me to do second marriage. I would add here that he recently told me before going for hajj that he had been bisexual before marriage and has done infidelities multiple times with both men and women but after marriage has stopped. My heart has stopped loving and trusting him and I don't even like it when he touches me because his attitude towards me is still the same. Should I get separated? Is it ok for me to leave him or stay? I am unable to communicate with him because he will fight and hurt me. I don't want to destroy our relation but my heart no longer likes him.

Q: I have two children Alhamdulillah. Both are boys age four years and two and a half years. Both are very naughty/aggressive by nature. I am trying to mange them but some times I feel that I am too strict with them so I try to change my behaviour, but when I change myself they became more aggressive and not ready to listen to anything. Sometimes it becomes really awkward and embarrassing when we (me and my wife) are calling them for something but they simply ignoring us and when we try to be little strict they (specially the younger one) starts shouting and crying for hours. Please guide me what Islam says about this situation? Is getting a little strict permissible or not? What is the best way treat a child?