Advice

Q: What should the husband do if he is forced to go with his mother for hajj as he is the only available mahram for her as his father refuses to accompany her? The husband has a wife and kids and will have to leave them alone. What could be done to alleviate this situation as its causing tension as the wife does not have any family close by. Also, the husband is only doing it because of his mother, and another thing is that the father will be paying for the costs, so he will be sending them whilst himself hasn't fulfilled his fardh duty, its unnecessary trouble between husband and wife. please help.

Q: I am suffering from depression. I wanted to marry a boy from a different culture to mine and his family rejected based on culture. This has ruined my mentality on everything. Islam is about being united and if we have chosen someone suitable to marry based on character it should be allowed. Now I feel like this world is only based on people marrying in each others culture, I hate that mentality and I don’t like my own culture. I am a very simple girl and would prefer to follow Islam. My brother who is also a Mufti. I thought he could help me with other situations which I am going through and he broke my trust and I cannot trust him or anyone in my family. My family don’t listen and don’t understand me. I pray and cry in my dua’s everyday for Allah to help me. I pray the Qur'an every night and listen to it in the morning. I feel like everything is just becoming worse. Too many problems in one go. I think about death everyday and pray to Allah that I don’t want to be in this world anymore and I have learnt that we shouldn’t be doing things like that. I want to stop feeling like this but people and situations around me do not help and I feel angry and depressed all the time. I was wondering if there is any duas for depression that will help me?

Q: What is the best way to learn Arabic language? Can I learn it myself or I have to learn it under the supervision of some scholar? I have an Arabic grammar book which is in urdu, my urdu is good so I found it really easy to understand. Can I learn Arabic myself and ask things which I don't understand from some scholar?

Q: My parents are in severe financial debt. Can I sell my mahar Kruger coin to help them. Do I need to seek my husbands permission to sell it.

Q: I have a question. I was ill since age of 11. I was diagnosed with OCD (Wehem) a psychiatric disease. I was so mentally occupied that three years of my childhood was a nightmare. Again after age of 18 the the disease relapsed and lasted for seven years in one or other form. My father and mother helped me with treatment and care. I had very miserable life. But Allah gave me health and strength. Now I am an engineer. but from the last three years my hairs turned white on head chest and beard. I am young. I felt humiliation and low esteemed throughout after the age of seven. Now I am 32 years old with white hairs. I feel more humiliated. People used to laugh at me by seeing my face which looks older than my age now. I believe that is because of this disease. My disease is almost gone. But my feeling of low self esteem and ugly looks make me angry. I feel why Allah made me like this. I make na-shukri which I don't want to do. Sometimes I feel so close to Allah and accept this as Allah's gifts. But sometimes I feel na-shukri very rigidly when someone laughs at my looks with older face, big nose and white hairs. I pray to Allah to help me and give me success in both worlds and make me beautiful and blessed. Please guide me to keep away from this na-shukri and get my black hairs back.

Q: I feel that a person will come and take me away from Islam. He will misguide me and I will be misguided. I am so scared ( afraid) that I will loose my faith and a misguided person will come and misguide us. I don't know what to do? It's too complicated for me.

Q: Sometimes I realize this bad feelings from people about me and I sometimes simply don't know why, I feel guilty when nothing simply happens to me and I just have this strange look and behavior that I myself don't like about me  and also I just feel low about myself. I am so confused. Its is creating confusion in me and it is causing people to think and feel different things about me. Please is there any duah or thing I can do Islamically?

Q: Please help me with a dilemma that I have encountered since my recent second marriage to a most amazing man with two children whom I love and treat as my own. I have encouraged the youngest child to start reading his salaah albeit one a day only. The problem is that they are caught up in strange rituals that I do not understand nor that I wish to be part of.

1. The many meeladhs that they conduct with salami being recited at the home of relatives.

2. The mother of the 2 boys has requested that they get green strings during the time of Muharram to wear on their wrists?

Should I be quiet and pray that Allah (Ta'ala) guides them if this is wrong? I feel as if this is going to cause my husband and I to become distant because of our differences. Please tell me what I should do. Jazakallah khair.

Q: A sister is asking that her husband wants to go for jamaat for one year and she can't even stay away from him for two months without being close to him at night. She does bad things alone without her husband when he is not there. She can't control herself. She tried to fast but because of her health her doctor told her to eat. She is very weak.

Q: A sister is saying that her husband is not coming close to her at nights and that whenever she ask him he refuses. He wasn't like this before. He doesn't show any interest in her. She has two babies. It's been more then many months now. She says that she starts to feel that its something in her that maybe is unattractive. She said she feel shes is not married. She makes food and takes care of her children and also cleans the house. Her husband is only on the phone, don't like her to even hug him, says stay away. She misses her days back when they were newly married. He don't even like to sit and talk to her.