Advice

Q: My husband thinks I am a salafi, just because I say "salafi" things. But I am not, I am only asking such things, so he could clarify for me. I always ask whether what i'm saying is correct or not. But he jumps to conclusions and accuses me of becoming a salafi, and believing the statements I say (which I  don't!). I have a few salafi colleagues, who talk about things and I always come home and ask him. I admit before I was married I used to believe what they said because I didn't know what was correct or not, but now I know, I always ask. We always end up arguing about these things, and he gets angry and makes a scene. I tell him to shut up, which I know is rude. But I don't want his whole family to hear us arguing. What shall I do?

Q: I just wanted to tell there is a lot of problems at home, constantly there is fighting at home. There are fights happening every day and my Bhabhi and my brothers are very rude to my parents. I request if you would help me and suggest something so that insha Allah everything goes well at home and everything is normal. Please suggest me the best dua from your end so that insha Allah everything goes well Insha Allah.

Q: I have been married since the last four years. It's an arranged marriage. My husband is very abusive, physically and verbally and would always threaten to leave me. We would somehow get back together and I would forgive and forget everything. That will probably make the situation worse. But now I can't ignore it. I have to tell him that he cannot talk to me in that way, it hurts me. If it continues, and he is not willing to open up or show me respect, then I would consult someone who knows and cares about me and my family who can help me to figure out how to best deal with the situation. I know there are lots of couples that argue and then talk about it afterwards but I don’t talk about arguments, but about galiyaan. He shouldn’t be giving me gaaliyan. I don’t care how big his ego is. There is no excuse for giving his wife gaaliyan, calling me prostitute. It hurts! If I forgive him an let it go easily he’s going to think his gaaliyan are acceptable by me. I don’t let him ever think it’s okay for him to curse me. I am his wife, his other half, marriage is based on respect for each other, and if one partner has lost respect for the other half, how long can one go on? What should I do?

Q: I require some advice regarding a situation with my in laws. We don't have the best of relationships and my mother in told me that I have never done anything to be a daughter to her or a sister to my sister in law. After this, I was hurt and decided to keep away from them. Yesterday my father in law approached us and my mother in law lied saying she never said that and lied and said I told her I suffered in their home. My father in-law believes her. My mother in-law then called me a ... and told my husband she wants nothing to do with us. My father in-law phoned me today, shouting and insulting me and demanding I phone my mother in-law and ask her for maaf. He said she is my mother in-law and I must do it. And then he told me who am I and said you are nothing and he cut the call. I require advice on how does one handle this situation and would like to know what are the rights of a daughter in law.

Q: I have problems in my marriage also in my brothers marriage. Please give me some dua for a happy married life.

Q: Can a man start over and walk away from his children of his previous marriage without having anything to do with them in future? Can he completely cut himself off from his children?

Q: Am I wrong to feel hurt and upset when my husband who claims to be innocent at home is over friendly when meeting female family members or
friends of mine outside. He also likes to play around and touch, poke, prod my mother, sister in law, cousins and thinks he's just playful and innocent and thinks nothing of it. I see more to his behaviour and feel disgusted. He even accidently bumps into females but I know its on purpose. What is wrong with him? Or am I wrong for being so angry and hurt?

Q: I am pregnant again early stage seven weeks. The last pregnancy I had a very bad one. My daughter was born with a chromosome problem and I was in hospital for a year and I had to leave my other four children. Please tell me what to do because I don't want to be put in the same situation.

Q: I'm married to a Egyptian who is also married in his country. I have just found out he's married 6 years already. My Question is he is not being fair in nafqa with her an me and there's also a lot of other problems. I have just recently discovered that I can have him deported back to his country but do I do it or do I just leave him and make sabr for the sake of Allah Ta'ala? I'm so scared to do something but he really is not treating me with fairness.

Q: I am suffering from a big problem. My brain thinks wrong about Islam and many other things. What should I do? I remain upset and under tension.