Pregnancy and Parenting

Q: After deliverying a baby, females usually get a daily massage for a few weeks. This includes rubbing the stomach, thighs, back, calfskin etc., how can I get this done without exposing my satr?

Q: Which parent has Islaam given the right of making the final decision in regards to the tarbiyat of the child? Which parent has the right to decide as to what the child may eat or not?

NB: Everything is within the sharia. There is no divorce.

Q: Is it permissible to let a baby sleep in his own room? The baby is 3 months. 

Q:

1. Is it permissible for a woman to request surgery (caesarian section) instead of natural birth so as to avoid the pain of labour?

2. Is there any nifas in the case of caesarian section birth?

Q: A father said that he will admit their child in a madrasah, but the mother said that she will not admit their child in a madrasah. The mother respects Allah and Islam, she also wants the child to know about Islam and she wants to teach the child about Islam by an Islamic teacher. The father and mother then admitted their child in a school (not an Islamic school and not a madrasah) and appointed an Islamic teacher to teach their child how to pray salaah, read Quran, duas, Islamic characters, lifestyle, etc. so that child learns about islam. Is there any sin?

Q: In some cultures, nowadays, parents tend to hide or cover a hadith or some Islamic knowledge from their children. They say that it’s something you’ll need to know when you grow up – as in when you get married. Should children – after puberty, at least – not have full knowledge about Islam before marriage? For example, there are ahaadith relating to zina. There’s knowledge about sexual intercourse, about pregnancy, about masturbation, etc. which most children do not know about; unless they’re very curious and tend to look up themselves, which causes further sins, i.e pornography.

Children would not know that masturbation is haraam unless it’s told to them. Masturbation is so common during youth, and children are not aware of the fact that it’s haraam, or if you did it, you have to do ghusl prior to praying. Should a woman/man tell their children about sexual intercourse right before the day of marriage, as this would cause fear in the heart of a young girl just before marriage? I heard a father telling their daughters about this hadith but only up till كَذَا وَكَذَا i.e. he left out the last 2 words, كُلُّ عَيْنٍ زَانِيَةٌ وَالْمَرْأَةُ إِذَا اسْتَعْطَرَتْ فَمَرَّتْ بِالْمَجْلِسِ فَهِيَ كَذَا وَكَذَا يَعْنِي زَانِيَةً Was this right of him to do so?

Also, women don’t allow their children to read full Islamic books, written by great people, like Bahishti Zewar written by Ashraf Ali Thanwi (rahmatullahi 'alaihi). They just let them read what they think is important for the “kids” to know, and leave out the “adult” chapters, even in the daily Ta’leem. Parents are oblivious of the fact that children are aware of everything they are aware of. Since nowadays, kids learn everything from their Biology textbooks and that, too, in detail—Isn’t it better that parents give them that knowledge by letting them read Islamic books, or by informing them of various sins i.e. as in what’s adultery, etc.?

Q: I got two step sons. If I tell them it's time to pray then they get upset but they pray. If I don't tell them then they don't pray by themselves. If I chase them every time then my husband says to me to let them do the rest some other time because they are tired. What should I do? They are 11 and 14 years old.

Q: What is the shar'i perspective with regards to putting specifically black beads on the hand of a new born baby or small knives etc. in order to protect the child from any form of evil.

Also, what would be the best method to protect the child from forms of evil etc when the child is born.

Q: Do only parents have the highest position and right to be respected and kids deserve no respect? If parents don't treat every child with equality by loving one child more and not caring for the others, is it ok in shariah?

Q: I recently found out that I am pregnant alhamdulilah and read the following on a website:

“During pregnancy frightening pictures of deformed children or animals should not be seen. One should look at beautiful children, flowers and should smell beautiful fragrances.”

I am an occupational therapist and daily interact with those who have various physical and mental disabilities whom I try to help by providing therapy so that they are able to engage in everyday activities independently.

Should I therefore stop working and providing therapy while I am pregnant and will I it affect my baby?