Various masaail of Nikaah

Q: I heard that there is a hadith which states that if a husband follows what his wife tells him to do, he will have la'nat on him. Is this correct?

Q: I want to find out if A and B are invited to a wedding or walima and have to Rsvp. They Rsvp but in their place C and D go. Is it correct if C and D go without asking the host. Or do u have to take permission from the host to take another person in your place.

Q: In sha Allah I'll be getting married to a girl I love 2 days from now. We did not date or hangout because we knew it was haraam. We got our families in touch and they have agreed to marry us. However my mother decided that I am not ready to bring her home because I am not that financially strong. (I live in Pakistan, I make 2000 USD a month, I am 23, I am quite well off compared to everyone my age and a huge percentage of adults).

They also said that we can't bring the girl home unless I pay 25000 USD for a grand event. The standard 3 day wedding in our country.

I really need your guidance as to what I should do. I love this girl and I want to hang out with her. My mother says that I can't even hang out with her after nikkah. And I should wait one year to bring her home and then meet her. This all sounds and feels so stupid and painful. My mother has no real logical reason to do this. Please tell me what to do? I'm already working so hard and did my best to always stay halaal.

Q: If someone doesn't want to get married. Will their parents be sinful for this?

Q: My husband and I have been married for 35 years. For years now things haven't been good between us. He had several extramarital affairs and treats me disrepectfully. We kept on trying but it's not working. I keep worrying what will happen if I pass away. I have 4 adult children, 2 of whom live at home and are financially dependant on us.

Previously when I made enquiries I was told that in the case of divorce, my husband would get half of my pension. I worked for 27 years and put all my money in helping him provide for our family. Alhamdulillah, we're married in CoP. For me the worry is what would happen to my children as my son is 32 and has a mental health diagnosis and my daughter is unmarried, pregnant & still studying. Giving away half of my pension would be a knock financially.

I would like to have our civil marriage dissolved but remain married Islamically, at least until I feel I can manage that as well. I know I should have divorced him years ago but I kept hoping he would mend his ways but unfortunately things have become worse over time. I would want him to get some money from my pension so he can at least set himself up with a place to stay but definitely not 50%. He's previously said we should keep the house. He doesn't have a pension benefit. Would getting a legal divorce mean we're divorced according to Shariah automatically? We are South African and follow the Hanafi madhab. 

Q: Can a married woman whose age is 27 have a second marriage due to sex and economic necessity. She can't take a divorce as her husband is ill and they also have a 6 year old child. She has not had sexual relations with her husband for the last 3 years as her husband is incapable. So she is afraid of getting involved in zina. Can she take a second husband.

Q: When a couple are divorced, then all gifts are to remain with the person they were given to, but what about the wedding ring? This is given as a recognition of being married. Thus, on termination of the marriage, should the wedding ring be given back to the husband?

Q: When speaking of the qiwamah of a man over his wife (i.e. his “authority” over her), we need to realize that this is a burden and a responsibility, not an honour and favour. The man’s responsibility is not restricted to maintaining his wife financially, housing, feeding, etc. He is also responsible for looking after her emotional, spiritual and physical needs. Allah’s command is to treat wives kindly and on a footing of equity and what is acceptable. وعاشروهن. Al-qiwamah is in no way meant to turn the husband into some sort of dictator who thinks he is a master who orders and forbids and should be obeyed unrestrictedly. There are so many nuances to look at when we look at these issues. One such nuance is that Allah did not say that males are qawwam over women; rather, He said “men” are qawwam. This is something we need need to think about and ponder; for how many males are not really “men”.

Is this above writing correct? If I feel like for my husband's thinking attitude is harming my imaan, I often think bad of Islam that it favors men over women should I leave him?

Q: It's really a tragedy to be born in this day and age. How should one find a pious Muslim man for marriage? Muslim men are disgusting nowadays.

Is it true that women pay for the sins committed by men of their family?

Q: My brother is having his nikaaah at a masjid in December. He is insistent that his future wife would like all the women to attend the nikaaah at the masjid. He says that there will be separate facilities and the women will be wearing masks as a hijaab. He wants hadith or a valid reason as to why women should not attend. He also says if Nabi (sallallahi alayhi wasallam) didn't forbid it then why are certain Ulama say its not permissible while other Ulama say it is correct to attent provided there is separation. He argues that my mother should attend and keep family ties.

Could Moulana please inform me from the hadith and teachings of our Nabi what would be the correct thing to do.

He says that he will not set foot in his mother's home if she refuses to attend his function at the masjid.