Advice

Q: When conducting Taleem at home, I recite tasmiya before starting to read from Fazaail-e-Amaal. My father gets very angry and shouts at me saying that I must ta'wuz along with the tasmiya. I explained to him that ta'wuz is to be recited before recitation of the Qur'an, yet he is not satisfied with this. In all the bayaans and kitaab-readings I have attended, I have never heard anyone recite ta'wuz along with tasmiya. Hence, I do not do so. But my father, who is a faasiq, tells me: "Is it not better to recite Ta'wuz? Why do you not like doing it?" Anyhow, with the incorrect behaviour of my father aside:

1. Is my father correct?

2. With the exception of reciting the Qur'an Shareef or when faced with some Shaytaani thought/confrontation, what occasions warrant the recitation of ta'wuz?

3. Why is ta'wuz not recited before a bayaan or a kitaab reading?

4. Is it "better" and "more rewarding" to recite ta'wuz before a bayaan or kitaab reading etc.?

5. Is it necessary to recite tasmiya and/or ta'wuz before reciting Ahadith?

Q: My husband is involved in many bad activities, takes so much interest in other women and porn but with me he is too rude and disrespectful. He always makes me feel down, as I'm such a useless thing and he is allergic to me. He doesn't want to see me, talk to me or have sex with me. His all desires are just for outside. It's too hard life for me. I'm living in great pain in every moment of my life due to his behaviour and activities and when I'm so much depressed and say something to him or about him, it will cause punishment for me in akhirah. I don't know what to do. I feel like my both worlds (dunya and akhirah) are hell due to this man. Please advise me some solution in the light of Islam so that I can live a happy life here and can enter in Jannah in akhirah.

Q: I'm a 24 year old student, doing my masters in communication engineering. My problem is that I try my best to avoid all types of sins, but despite all my efforts to stop evil things I can't stop myself from masturbating. My desire is so high that I can't control it and I've no way to stop myself from doing this bad thing. Kindly tell me how to stop this bad habit and control my desire. I pray regularly and try all to do good things, but this is the thing that makes me feel very ashamed of myself and disregard. My health is suffering badly. I'm very upset. Kindly help me in this regard and guide me.

Q: Please help me sir. I am in depression. I know my problem which I have written is too big and time consuming. Please help me. I am a 25 years old Muslim girl. My parents are finding suitable husband for me with which I am fine. I never had any past relationship. I believe Allah has already planned a very good man for me. I recently got a proposal from a very good family. I heard that the family and that the boy is very nice and suitable for me. My family became very happy and satisfied. That boy wanted to speak to me. I agreed. The conversation with him was very uncomfortable. He was speaking as if we are in a relationship. Within 24 hours of our conversation he told he is missing me which I found very awkward. I was worried so I did ishtekhara. I prayed to Allah to give me some indications. I prayed that if that person is not good for my deen, duniya and aakhirat, then please don't make me marry this person. He continuously calls me and messages me. I have stopped replying to him. I told him that from now on our elders will decide. He was insisting me to talk and convincing me to agree to this marriage. I denied marrying him. Now my family is worried that I have taken decision in a hurry and judged him too soon. My parents are disappointed and telling me that I have rejected a good proposal and now I am not going to get any better proposals and this is the reason why many girls don't get married at the right age and to a right person because of childish behaviour like me. I am extremely worried and low I am continuously praying to Allah that if I have done a mistake please forgive me. I am praying for a suitable proposal for me. I am upset. I am scared. Please help me.

Q: I have a very big problem. I can't stop lying to my family and friends. Also I feel it difficult to share personal information with those closest to me. I am completely isolated and feel that my pride is interfering with my relationships. Please help me with some advice how I can overcome this dilemma.

Q: I am a 25 year old muslim girl. Four years a go meat a guy and by time we both fell in love, its been 3.5y ears now we are in a relationship until today he did not touch me we did not do anything physical. After a few months of the relationship he went to Australia for a better life. He is Masha Allah a hafiz e quran and a very nice person. He is now in Australia he finished his education trying to get a PR his family has agreed on us getting married but my parents have issues like he is less educated then I am. His father had passed away when he was 3 so there is no one supporting him financially he is working in Australia and earning enough to pay his University fees and living and other expenses according to him he can also support his wife and a child. According to him he is well settled. His mother had called my mother to ask my hand in marriage 2 years a go after that his brother had called my father a number of times. First my father wanted him to finish his education now that the education is done and they are trying for a PR. His brother calls my father and gives him all the details my father just listens to the what they have to say and thats it gives no response my father also does not even tell my mother about the calls or messages. One time when his brother messaged my father my father saw the message but did not reply to it. If my mother tries to explain my father he gets angry and aggressive. We both are true and loyal and I want to make my love halaal. I do not want to hurt my parents. My friends also have told me to run away or get married without my parents knowing but I did not want to do that. Can you please guide me about what islam says about getting marred according to my will and can you tell me a dua that would help me convince my parents. And also please let me know that with this attitude of my father towards a person who is a hfiz quran prays all the namaz earns halaal has a good heart and character am I allowed to do my nikaah without my fathers permission.

Q: My question is that it's been 22 years of my daughters wedding. She has 4 daughters.actually my son in law is really very short tempered and abusive too and he mostly misdoubts on his daughters but infact my grand daughters are engaged in holy teachings including my daughter as well. My elder grand daughter has all the qualities which a girl should have. Due to my son in law all proposals are rejected so what should we recite? So what can we do to overcome this problem?

Q: I and my wife are currently experiencing marital issues/problems. After a heated argument/exchange I said to her that she must be out of the house when I get home. On my return that evening I found that my wife had indeed left, taking our four kids, all of their clothing, all of the groceries and some items which belonged to me. Apparently she went to her friends home and later that week to family (She was gone for a whole week), Subsequent to this I was served with a protection order wherein the Magistrate declared that I am to leave the property and that I am barred from entering my home until some time in October when the court will make a decision relating to the order whether it may make it permanent. I have been in a state of depression ever since and am now sharing a BED with my uncle as I have no other place to go to. I have not issued any Talaaq but have been instructed by her family that I must continue paying the rent and expenses as nafaakaah. Firstly, what rights do I have here, my wife does not want to re-concile saying that she needs time as I have caused too much damage over the 14 years of marriage. She says that she has until October, this is very unfair to me (my opinion) Admittedly I have done wrong in the past, I have expressed regret and remorse but she seems to not be listening / willing to let me back. I love my kids and do care for my wife and do not want to lose them. Please guide me and assist me here even if the pill is bitter to swallow.