Stray thoughts

Q: I am so lost I cry everynight for guidance for a little sign from Allah and I beg Allah to help me but nothing ever happens. I begin to wonder if, when you die, that's it, the end. What if Allah is not there but somthing else is?

Also, would you advise to stop watching videos online as they have misguided me and my iman before.

Premarital relationship

Q: When I was a teenager I liked a boy who was very religious and knowledgeable both generally and islamically, So I told about this boy to my family. And we got engaged. He saw me once. And he liked me a lot since then. We talked very rarely and it’s only about our marriage preparations. But we couldn’t get married that year so he flew abroad for his studies. I haven’t heard any news from him since then. And I waited for the holidays so he will comeback. I believed I was engaged. But then I heard from one of his relative’s sister that he nullified the engagement and I didn’t know what the reason was behind. I got many proposals at the same time from religious students of Islamic knowledge backgrounds. But yet I found very uncomfortable to accept other proposals. Because it hurts me a lot and a lot. Though I haven’t had any premarital relationship with him, but I don’t know I liked him very much and his personalities. I mailed him because I want to know what the reason was behind, and told him it would be very difficult for me to get married with some other, because I liked him very much. But I didn’t hear from him. So I accepted one of his friend’s proposals and got married. but the i heard from one of my friends that he was quite upset for letting me go. (my friend knw this from her husband) I tried so hard to forget about that boy but yet I find so uncomfortable with those feelings. My husband knows my past because he was a close friend of him. But my husband didn’t know what I’m going through with the pain inside my heart. I don’t want to ruin my life for a person who had no interest in me. I prayed Allah a lot to help me to forget him. And I tried my best to give my husband’s rights. But sometimes I get upset for knowing the boy I liked was more knowledgeable and a hafiz unlike my husband. The boy also got married one of my friends, and I feel how lucky she was although I make dua for them whenever shaitan used to whispers me. I fight with these uncomfortable feelings so hard for nearly 4 years of my marrige but sometimes I feel weak. Please advice me to get out from this pain.

Having a wedding ceremony after many years

Q: I am now marrried for 13 years. Unfortunetly during my wedding, my father in law had gotten ill. He passed away the day before my wedding. We had cancelled everything and just made the nikaah and fed the guests. We have always wanted to have a good wedding but that had not happened. Our nikaah was mixed with very big loss and most of the elders could not attend. All these years I have yearned for a proper opportunity to be a bride. If we would like to have like a reception or gathering is that Islamically allowed?

Doubting Islam

Q: Some non Muslims say that your Prophet was cursed. They say he fabricated against God. They give this proof وَلَوْ تَقَوَّلَ عَلَيْنَا بَعْضَ الْأَقَاوِيلِ Had he falsely attributed some statements to Us. لَأَخَذْنَا مِنْهُ بِالْيَمِينِ  We would have seized him by the right arm. ثُمَّ لَقَطَعْنَا مِنْهُ الْوَتِينَ

Narrated Ibn Ka'b b. Malik: On the authority of his father: Umm Mubashshir said to the Prophet (ﷺ) during the sickness of which he died: What do you think about your illness, Messenger of Allah (ﷺ)? I do not think about the illness of my son except the poisoned sheep of which he had eaten with you at Khaybar. The Prophet (ﷺ) said: And I do not think about my illness except that. This is the time when it cut off my aorta.

Abu Dawud said: Sometime 'Abd al-Razzaq transmitted this tradition, omitting the link of the Companion, from Ma'mar, from al-Zuhri, from the Prophet (ﷺ), and sometimes he transmitted it from al-Zuhri from 'Abd al-Rahman b. Ka'b b. Malik, 'Abd al-Rahman mentioned that Ma'mar sometimes transmitted the tradition in a mursal form (omitting the link of the Companion), and they recorded it. And all this is correct with us.

'Abd al-Razzaq said: When Ibn al-Mubarak came to Ma'mar, he transmitted the traditions in a musnad form (with a perfect chain) which he transmitted as mauquf traditions (statements of the Companions and not of the Prophet).

حَدَّثَنَا مَخْلَدُ بْنُ خَالِدٍ، حَدَّثَنَا عَبْدُ الرَّزَّاقِ، حَدَّثَنَا مَعْمَرٌ، عَنِ الزُّهْرِيِّ، عَنِ ابْنِ كَعْبِ بْنِ مَالِكٍ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، أَنَّ أُمَّ مُبَشِّرٍ، قَالَتْ لِلنَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فِي مَرَضِهِ الَّذِي مَاتَ فِيهِ مَا يُتَّهَمُ بِكَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ فَإِنِّي لاَ أَتَّهِمُ بِابْنِي شَيْئًا إِلاَّ الشَّاةَ الْمَسْمُومَةَ الَّتِي أَكَلَ مَعَكَ بِخَيْبَرَ ‏.‏ وَقَالَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏ "‏ وَأَنَا لاَ أَتَّهِمُ بِنَفْسِي إِلاَّ ذَلِكَ فَهَذَا أَوَانُ قَطَعَتْ أَبْهَرِي ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو دَاوُدَ وَرُبَّمَا حَدَّثَ عَبْدُ الرَّزَّاقِ بِهَذَا الْحَدِيثِ مُرْسَلاً عَنْ مَعْمَرٍ عَنِ الزُّهْرِيِّ عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم وَرُبَّمَا حَدَّثَ بِهِ عَنِ الزُّهْرِيِّ عَنْ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ كَعْبِ بْنِ مَالِكٍ وَذَكَرَ عَبْدُ الرَّزَّاقِ أَنَّ مَعْمَرًا كَانَ يُحَدِّثُهُمْ بِالْحَدِيثِ مَرَّةً مُرْسَلاً فَيَكْتُبُونَهُ وَيُحَدِّثُهُمْ مَرَّةً بِهِ فَيُسْنِدُهُ فَيَكْتُبُونَهُ وَكُلٌّ صَحِيحٌ عِنْدَنَا قَالَ عَبْدُ الرَّزَّاقِ فَلَمَّا قَدِمَ ابْنُ الْمُبَارَكِ عَلَى مَعْمَرٍ أَسْنَدَ لَهُ مَعْمَرٌ أَحَادِيثَ كَانَ يُوقِفُهَا ‏.‏ Grade : Sahih in chain (Al-Albani) صحيح الإسناد (الألباني) حكم :

Reference : Sunan Abi Dawud 4513 In-book reference : Book 41, Hadith 20 English translation : Book 40, Hadith 4499

Israaeeli names

Q: I like to know the meaning of the name Ifrahim (son of Hazrat Yusaf (alaihis salaam)? People usually say ifrahim but on net it's more like afrahim. Which is more correct in Arabic term?

Being a Muslim, is it a good name to keep?