Talaaq

Q: The more I saw him act like that and hurt me the more my sihr took over and I remember repeatedly getting thoughts to hurt him more, something in my mind saying now is your chance to push him so hard that he will regret it. This came into my mind over and over and I got nastier and nastier I could not control myself either, this time I could not even stop, then all I remember was him coming up to my face saying 'if this is what you want then here take it, divorce, divorce, divorce. You asked and pushed for it now there you have it' I still went on not thinking clearly now more angry than ever, I provoked him more saying you going to regret this again and come crying to me tomorrow put it in writing you coward and he did, saying 'I divorce Fathima because of her family' I realized now that he was in such a state that if I put a gun in his hand as well and told him to shoot himself, he would have which he confirmed. That's how lost he was. I really believe without a doubt that he would and that’s the scariest thought! Even though damage is done to some extent I could not lose him forever. I love him for the pleasure of Allah and he is everything I ever wanted, I just wish this would stop! I then still went on and he still went on I knew he had lost it this time, lost his mind as he did not know the nonsense he was uttering. He then broke the dishes by slamming it to the ground, pieces flying all over and stormed up and down punching the wall and going mad. I kept wondering who is this guy he is insane! I told him you're a lunatic and he said yes that's who you've made me. After a while it hit me when I was normal again, I started to cry and then my whole world came crashing down. I did not know what overtook me.

Q: I am a recently widowed woman, who has met a man who is divorced. He has not been living with his wife for the last 3 years. He does not see either his daughters nor his wife accept on Eid. He has told me that he is divorced legally. I have checked with the home affairs and it is true. He told me that he had given her 1 talaaq and waited for her to come back home but she had not returned since that day 3 years ago. Islamically is his nikaah still binding with her? Can she still come back to him and their nikaah will still be valid? Why does he not want to make a commitment with me, has something to do with his nikaah!

Q: A revert is asked by his wife for a divorce, which he refuses. She applies for a court interdict after they have a fight and his Muslim lawyer advises him to agree to the divorce in exchange for the wife not asking for the interdict. He reluctantly agrees but still doesn't give talaaq. A few weeks later his lawyer says that the wife is waiting for the talaaq and he must give it. He writes "I hereby give you a divorce" and the lawyer adds "in this regard I give you 3 talaaq." He signs it and the lawyer emails it to the wife. What is the validity of this divorce and is it 3 or 1? The husband says he has never wanted the divorce and it was never his intention to give 3 as he did not understand what this meant.  

Q: If someone sends a talaaq with somebody. He sends a photocopy saying I give talaaq 1,2,3. No Signature on the paper. Now he says he didn't write it. Must she begin her iddat, or is it not valid?

Q: I am in a dilemma. My parents used to have problems. In 2009 my mums dad passed away so my mum went for the burial and thereafter decided to stay at her own mums house. Since then she hasn't met my dad. She wanted a divorce which my dad isn't ready to give, so she applied for khula. Our community is helping in this but they are very slow. She works at her dad's shop, so another man has liked her. Because our community is very slow, this man went to the qadhi and made him sign the divorce papers and the qadhi even performed their nikah but my dad doesn't know about this and there was no wali at the time of nikah. Both my mum and that man sit and talk. Please explain if this is halaal or not? 

Q: My husband gave me three talaaqs. He did not tell me he divorces me, however his brother gave me a paper saying divorce between so and so.(Husband and wifes name) 

1. talaaq
2. talaaq
3. talaaq

My husband and I had a intercourse a week later. Is our talaaq valid as we did this during our waiting period. My husband also says that he was angry and his brother convinced him to do talaaq he did not want to and now wants me back. We have two small kids together and it wasnt his intention or he did not want to part from us. Please advise if our talaaq was valid?

Q: I divorced my wife for the second time. What should I do?

Q:  What happens in a case where Talaaq is given in writing and only one witness from the husband side signs it while a witness from the wife's side refuses to sign?

Q: Please be so kind to explain to me the types of Talaaq. Furthermore, can a husband after giving a Talaaq Baain to his wife move from the (rented) house while the wife in Iddat stays in the (rented) house?

Q: The following event took place over a year ago.

Zaid went off to study at the darul-uloom. Hinda was feeling neglected. Contact was made between Hinda and at least one third party male whom we shall call Zubair. Although no physical inappropriate would be proven, Zaid had gained recordings of some of the nightly phone conversations through a secret source which resided in the neighbourhood of Hinda. Zaid threatened her on one Sunday. The exchange of the dialogue was as follows:

Conversation one:

Zaid: Are you talking to a male other then myself?

Hinda: No.

Zaid: If you insist on lying, and if I ever said: you would be given one talaq, would you still insist on denying that you are not speaking to a male other then myself?

Hinda: I have never spoken to any male other then you. I am the daughter of an Aalim, who do you think I am?

Zaid: Ok, if you insist that you did not talk to a male that I have a recording of, than it is fine. If you did talk to a male other then myself, then one talaq falls upon you.

Hinda: I am not lying, why do you not trust me.

Conversation two: one to two weeks later:

Zaid: Look, I have proof that you have talked to a male other than me. This male is not a brother or uncle. You are talking to this male late at night. Is his name not Zubair (originals name has been change.)

Hinda: Nothing at all (meaning physical) happened, it was just a conversation. I was lonely…. (Based on Hindas acknowledgement of the conversation, does any talaq at all occur?)

Conversation three: Zaid meets her in the boarding of the madressa just before graduation:

Zaid: Can I please have the extra secret phone card (phone number) you have.

Hinda: I do not have any secret phone (sim card)

Zaid: Please be honest, and save our marriage. I beg you Hinda. Do you have a (sim) secret phone number?

Hinda: No, I don’t have a secret number; I told you that in front of my father few hours ago.

Zaid: If I was to tell you that if you have a secret sim (phone number) then a talaq would take place, would you go along with this? 

Hinda: yes I would go along because I am not lying. I told you I do not have an extra phone number. There would be no need to threaten me with a divorce. You are just seeking a way out of our marriage.

Zaid: Ok, if you have an extra  sim card other than the one I am aware of, or a secret phone number, than one talaq is given to you.

Conversation four:

Ziad: I know you have a secret card, please give it to me. I have a recording that proves this. Let’s call the number.

Hinda: ok, after searching her private belongings, she takes out the secret phone number. ‘Here it is.’ Extra (secret) phone number is handed over and a call is made to her father by her with the acknowledgement made as to the secret phone number she had with her. The same secret phone number she lied to in front of her father. The secret number she used to contact male other than her husband whilst residing in her father’s home.

Although I am ambivalent about our marriage, I have delayed in displaying the above scenario to anyone. It was document as it took place and kept aside. I really do not like my wife based on the above thing she had done, nor do I want a divorce. I can answer the above questions had a stranger brought me the case, but regarding my own matter, I am tongue tied. To make matters worse, a naqshabandi shiek was contacted by me. My father in law requested a need for continual reformation (islah). The shiek said the following to me: Are you married? Or do you think you are married? Sometimes we feel we are married but divorced and living in zina. Even since he mentioned these words, I have become paranoid regarding my situation.

Simply asked: How many talaq have taken place. This happened over a year ago. We have not physical met for over a year as a result of geographical separation.

The lady feels that no talaq has taken place and that shaytan is creating a wedge between the husband and wife. She has been told to mention the above matter to her alim father, but feels nothing negative (talaq) has taken place, so there is no need to make mention of the above. Zaid does not want to be with her, but his heart is not inclined to divorce based on certain Hadith. Also, did Zaid divorce her, or did she divorce herself due to lies as a default?

My parents and other family members would be devastated should the above constitute a divorce. Do I have to inform them about a divorce, that is, if you folks feel it has taken place. Or can I be silent about the matter.