Doubting the existence of Allah Ta'ala

Q: I am an Egyptian girl, 16 years old and I was born a Muslim in a Muslim household. I’ve always believed in Allah and prayed. I never had any doubts towards the existence of God because I was born a Muslim and my parents taught me from a young age, since I was born, therefore I had no option but to believe, of course like any other born Muslim kid.

I didn’t know anything about other religions and the possibility of existence of atheists except in ancient times as I learned at school etc. like any typical child. I was like “OF COURSE THERE IS ALLAH.” I was happy, I prayed, everything was ok untill a month ago. I started diving deep on the internet, after I had bad thoughts like “how is there a God... does God really exist?’ etc.

I fell into a state of depression, gradually. I didnt sleep, I didnt eat, I lost weight and I got sick and I had to tell my mom to help me because I can't tell anyone else such a thing. She kept telling me “Its the Shaitan, and stuff like that... and we watched videos together to make me feel better.

I became slightly better after overthinking all the time to thinking less. I was always afraid, but now I feel empty. Im so afraid that I feel like I surrendered to my thoughts. I need guidance again, I just want my strong faith back... What do I do? Please help me.

Wearing underwear in ihraam

Q: I went for hajj this year. I had to wear underpants under my ihram due to a medical reason which was approved by my doctor. During hajj I was told I have to pay a dum because I am not allowed to wear any other clothing apart from ihram, regardless of a medical condition. I wanted to know if this is true.

Marrying one's cousin

Q: Can I marry my paternal uncle's son? His paternal grandfather and my paternal grandfather are full brothers. His father is elder to my father and is my paternal uncle. Is this marriage acceptable according to Islam?

Satisfying one's wife during intimacy

Q:

1. Is it recommended or even mandatory that the woman orgasms during a sexual relationship with her husband.

2. If the husband has reached orgasm, is it mandatory or recommended to wait until the woman has her orgasm and then stop the sexual relationship.

3. For me, once I reach my orgasm (the sperm is out) I cannot continue the sexual activity, but my wife tells me that it is her right to have an orgasm also. The result is that all these words and attitudes have broken the desire for my wife. I do not want to touch my wife because I have a disgust in me. I have the impression that the roles are reversed, although I have always been indulgent in sex with my wife.

All the more her sexual appetite is much greater than mine, please advise us.