Conditions for faskh
Q: Please confirm the procedure and conditions of granting a faskh?
Talaaq
Faskh of nikaah
Q: I received my faskh via a Moulana and did not go through the shariah court or our MJC. The moulana confirmed that I have grounds for my faskh as I advised that my husband does not fully support me and the children and makes more time for his friends. He also spends weekends at his parents house without me and the kids. The moulana only confirmed this with my husband and then provided my annulment certificate in the same week. I heard on the radio that a faskh will not be valid by any Imam or moulana as it must go through the Muslim judicial counsel. Is this necessary? Is my faskh valid and is it compulsory for me to go for counselling first?
Husband asking the wife "What do you want to do regarding this marriage?"
Q: If I tell my wife "what do you want to do regarding this marriage", whether or not she wants to stay with me or not with the intention of not transferring the right to divorce but just discussion, is it considered one divorce if she says, "I don't want to be involved in this marriage anymore" but then afterwards she says "she does but not live with my parents" but with me alone?
Husband saying "Tum Azaad ho"
Q: If a couple are having a discussion on the fone on various issues including divorce then the husband says "you are free to do anything" by which he intends regarding wife's career, then will nikah be affected? Like in Urdu if you say "tumazad ho" then sareeh divorce happens. The couple are pakistani, live there and had the discussion in both urdu and english.
Mother refusing to handover custody of the children to the father
Q: According to Islam when parents are divorced, the father acquires custody of the kids when the boy is 7 & girl is 9. What if the mother does not want to let the kids go to the father (who is remarried)? The mother (not remarried) works full day and is away from the kids for 11hours a day. How can the father obtain custody?
Husband saying "You not my wife"
Q: My husband is using these word for a lot "You not my wife" and he also says "You want divorce?". I don't like him to say such words. Will I be divorced by him using such words?
Revoking the talaaq
Q: If a woman is given one divorce, is it permissible for her to continue living in the same house as her husband? Also, if they realize that the divorce was given in haste and they want to reconcile, do they have to make nikaah again?
Custody of children after talaaq
Q: This is regarding child custody post talaq/khula. From my research I have been able ascertain that the children are eventually given to their father. My question is, do the children have any say in this? Will they be asked with whom they wish to live with? My sisters husband has an extremely good reputation outside the house, however at home his wife and daughters are terrified of him. My sister does not wish to abandon the kids by taking khula. How does islam tell us to approach this situation?
Three talaaqs
Q: I gave my wife 3 talaqs at once. On the Internet 75% of imams say marriage is over, while other imams say 3 talaaqs together count as 1. She told me Wallahi Internet is not accurate, & the imam said it counts as 1. I had intercourse with her because I believed she was truthful but I felt guilty. I have since given official shariah talaaq. Are we both sinful or does she carry the greater burden?
Saying "I do not want anything to do with you"
Q: I married a women who had become Muslim from Hinduism some months earlier. She knew I was married Islamically to another person and knew the family. People doubted her sincerity as a Muslim but I gave her the benefit of doubt. Soon after she became Muslim we started having problems. We agreed that she would not disclose the marriage to anyone as it may create problems, from her Hindu family and my side. During one of our many arguments after she was shouting abuse, I said 'I do not want anything to do with you - it is finished' Is this a divorce ? After a week we made up. Then we had another bust up, in a park after she started shouting abusive things about my wife - I was fed up and said 'I do not want anything to do with you and said something like I divorce you.' She went hysterical and started shouting abuse in front of people in the park. A day or so later, I was driving with her in the car, and did not speak as I was listening to the radio. I thought it would be better to stay quiet to avoid arguing. She proceeded to take some pills and as I reached my destination, she said I have taken these pills and you will now suffer. It was to attract attention, and I said I am going home to see my family and kids, to which she started swearing filthy words and other abuse. At that time I said I do not want anything to do with her and wanted to finish. That same day she had passed the Nikah details to her sister who confronted my first wife who was distraught. Two days later she visited my wife and told her secrets of the private love life and my wife was distressed. I suspected this was an attempt to get my first wife to leave me, which she did not. Then during Ramadhaan she went back to India to her Hindu family - which given that this was to be her first Ramadhaan was a surprise. During communications, I wrote 'every door has been shut'. I even wrote to one of her texts 'look we finished Islamically so many times. You destroyed that finally.' A few days later we began texting in a less confrontational way as there are feelings of much warmth despite the issues . She texted 'Am I still your wife' She went on to write 'According to me you are my husband'. I wrote back 'If that is what you believe that is good...but it is very complex....is there 1 divorce, 2 or 3...if it is 3 its over ...if its 2 its not...2 means final chance....it is that important we make it right.' I went on to write ...'it may mean going to mufti..'
Taking away the fact that there are bound to be jealousies, and agendas, and suspicions about the motive of becoming a Muslim and marrying me. At the end of the day there is love and whatever she has done has been I believe out of uncontrollable love. I feel obligated to help her and care for her because of her commitment, but then I do see that nasty angry side which has led me to react the way I did over time. Is the marriage still in tact?