Nikaah & Marriage Issues

Q: In my country, before the actual nikaah, the qadhi goes to the bride's house to get her signature. Some people insist that there should be 2 witnesses there and some say no since this is not an actual nikaah but just to confirm that the bride has given her permission.

What is the ruling here? Should there be 2 witnesses when the bride gives her approval at her house and they have to be present in the nikaah to confirm that OR the mere statement of a wali during the nikaah (that my daughter has given her approval) is taken to be sufficient without the involvement of any witness (to confirm the above)?

Q: If a Muslim man and Muslim woman are married and either one of them utters a statement of Kufr (becomes a murtad [apostate]) while the other one stays Muslim, will their marriage terminate?

Will the marriage terminate at the moment that the statement of Kufr was uttered? Or will it terminate after 3 menstrual cycles? 

Q: At 6pm I feed my family. My husband comes late so he eats at 8pm earliest. I try to have my kitchen clean by the time I go to bed at 9pm or 10pm. I check on my husband. We sleep seperate (not ideal but it is what it is). I say goodnight to him and I go to my bed.

Sometimes he tells me that I am not allowed to go to sleep unless he gives me permission to go sleep? Am I disobedient if I go sleep?

This statement makes me feel like a slave and not like a wife.

Is this the level of obedience a wife must give to seek permission for basic human needs?

Q: My husband manipulated my sister and got married to my sister without giving me a divorce. When my sister got to know that their marriage is not valid after a year, she got married to another man. That man left my sister beacuse he thought she did nikah on nikah, but that was not the case.

Q: I have 2 children aged 2 years old and a 3 month old baby. My husband tells me that I have no right in making any decisions for the babies such as something as small as cutting or triming their hair, he has every right to make the decisions. Is he right?

What rights does a mother have? Should I just keep quite and let him do as he pleases even if it makes me unhappy?

Q: I would like to know the status of making a digital announcement poster upon the birth of a child.

Nowadays, people make a digital poster that they either put on their status or send to people announcing the birth of a child (no photograph of the child). Some go to the extent of putting the child's weight and height.

Personally, this is not something I am in support of however with extended family, there seems to be no control with regards to things like this.

Is it acceptable to allow this to happen or should the extended family be told not to do it?

Q: What is the ruling in a marriage where the husband and wife don't share rooms nor a bed but stay under the same roof? Is this permissible?

Q: Is this ruling correct:

Question: We have a small community in the country I live in, and weddings are an excellent opportunity to come together and meet (new) people, as everyone lives far away from each other, especially regarding marriage purposes (the potential of finding a suitable partner amongst the crowd).

Recently, two people from our community got married after someone had contacted them at a wedding they had both attended (they didn’t know about each other’s existence beforehand).

Weddings with no music rarely ever take place, sadly enough. I’d have to miss out on all of them otherwise. Thus, from this perspective (marriage purposes), would it be permissible to attend a wedding with music playing in the background?

Answer:

In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate

Yes. It is permissible to attend a wedding even though they play music in the background.

Background Versus Primary Activity

The ruling here revolves around the central issue, the wedding ceremony. Wedding ceremonies are permissible. The presence of music in the ceremony is a secondary characteristic. This secondary characteristic does not affect the fundamental permissibility of the wedding, according to the following axiom:

“Subsidiaries are subsidiary and are not given their own rulings.” [Ibn Nujaym, al-Ashbah wa al-Nazair]

If any impermissible actions become the focal point of the event, such as mixed-gender dancing or the like-continued involvement in the wedding at this point is impermissible. [Ibn ‘Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar]

Commanding the Good

If the music’s content is impermissible, then it is obligatory to advise those in charge of the ceremony to offer an acceptable alternative if there is a hope that your advice will result in change.

This is especially true and important for anyone who is an example or role model. [Nahlawi, Durar al-Mubaha]

The Permissible is Plenty

As Muslims, is it of central importance to know what Allah Most High permits and prohibits before taking on any endeavor, such as holding a wedding ceremony? Our plans for the ceremony must be through the lens of that knowledge.

There are many permissible avenues of entertainment that one can use for the wedding. This allows people to enjoy their time, and no one is turning away from the obedience of Allah in the meantime.