Nikaah & Marriage Issues

Fantasizing about other women

Q: I am married to my cousin (mother's side) 6 years ago.This was a pure arranged marriage and neither of us had any likeness apart from the fact that we were cousins before marriage. We both try to make salaah on time and we take care of each other as well.

My question is that what does Islam say if a husband has no physical attraction towards his wife despite so much efforts to feel attracted to her but still no feelings. During intercourse he only gets aroused sexually by imaging other women. Otherwise its not possible for him to get arouse sexually.

Kindly guide me what to do as this is killing me from inside. I don't know how long I can live like this. Besides this we have no arguments and no fights. She takes good care of me and I do the same, but it's only this one thing and it's happening for more than 5 years. What should I do? 

Marrying a sunni biddati boy

Q: I am 23 yrs old female. I have recently met a guy through a mutual friend who is 7 yrs elder to me. We have met only once and he told me he has a liking towards me and would like to talk to my parents regarding marriage. We know each other since 3 months and I find him perfect. Off lately,he told me that he is a sunni and he would want me to be a sunni Muslim and indulge in all the activities like niyaz and fatihah since it's the family tradition. I am very confused regarding this.

Which husband will a widow have in Jannah?

Q: I recently was asked to speak to a young man who wanted his mother to divorce her second husband. Whilst there were many valid reasons put forward as to why this divorce should go through, one statement was made which I do not fully comprehend. The son mentioned that when a woman re-marries, she will be in Jannah with the last man she was married to. Is this correct? In this case the woman was widowed as her husband was shot and killed in a robbery. The woman , no doubt , still has a lot of love and feeling for her late husband. They seem to be concerned about her ending up with her first husband in Jannah and hence justify the divorce from the second husband.Please advise.

Secondly, what is the Islamic viewpoint regarding making conditions on a person before nikah? For example, the woman will not fulfill conjugal rights or the woman will stay closer to her family instead of her in laws. Please advise.

Waleemah

Q: I am engaged to be married. My bride to be is doing her degree from home. She wants to stay at home till completion. So our families decided to hold the nikah soon and let me stay at her place to consummate the marriage. After she completes her degree we bring her home and give the traditional dinner party. Is that permissible in Islam? Please sight hadith for me to prove it to my neighbors.

Girls family not pleased with proposal

Q: I am in a love with a girl for the last 7 years. I asked my mother to go there and ask for rishta. We all went to her home and gave our proposal. They said they shall let us know a week later. After a week they invited us to their home and said we are fine and said Yes for marriage. Before going there me and my mother perform Istikhara and it was good but after saying yes they perform istikhara but saw negative signs. I asked a Mufti and he said you cannot perform istikhara after saying Yes. Please tell me what should I do?

Marrying a boy of one's parents choice

Q: I have a sister and she is 25 years old and I am her elder brother. Recently we have fixed my sisters marriage with a person who I know. Now I came to know she loves another man, so personally me, my brother, my mother and father tried to contact the boy who my sister loves. When we asked him he says that he don’t want to marry my sister. I did my utmost level to make my sister marry the person she loves but he don’t want to marry her at any cost and he keeps giving excuses of his parents.

Now my sisters marriage is already fix and my sister says that whatever my parents say she will do. I am concerned about my sister and I want to see her happy.

A few days back I spoke to her and explained to her, so she said she will marry with the person her parents wants. Somtimes she is happy somtimes she is sad. I don’t knw what to do. Will I be accountable infront of Allah if she married to the person of our choice.