Nikaah & Marriage Issues

Q: My husband and I have been married for 35 years. For years now things haven't been good between us. He had several extramarital affairs and treats me disrepectfully. We kept on trying but it's not working. I keep worrying what will happen if I pass away. I have 4 adult children, 2 of whom live at home and are financially dependant on us.

Previously when I made enquiries I was told that in the case of divorce, my husband would get half of my pension. I worked for 27 years and put all my money in helping him provide for our family. Alhamdulillah, we're married in CoP. For me the worry is what would happen to my children as my son is 32 and has a mental health diagnosis and my daughter is unmarried, pregnant & still studying. Giving away half of my pension would be a knock financially.

I would like to have our civil marriage dissolved but remain married Islamically, at least until I feel I can manage that as well. I know I should have divorced him years ago but I kept hoping he would mend his ways but unfortunately things have become worse over time. I would want him to get some money from my pension so he can at least set himself up with a place to stay but definitely not 50%. He's previously said we should keep the house. He doesn't have a pension benefit. Would getting a legal divorce mean we're divorced according to Shariah automatically? We are South African and follow the Hanafi madhab. 

Q:

1. Is intercourse during periods haraam?

2. Can it be done using condoms?

Q: Is it permissible to have an abortion? My wife needs to go for surgery and if she doesn’t have the surgery done she will die.

Q: I have fallen in love and I'm in a relationship with a transgender woman. I haven't been more confortable and happy ever before. Can I marry her?

Q: If my niece (sister's daughter) drank my breast milk at the age of two years and two months, will my son's be considered as her milk brothers?

Q: Can a married woman whose age is 27 have a second marriage due to sex and economic necessity. She can't take a divorce as her husband is ill and they also have a 6 year old child. She has not had sexual relations with her husband for the last 3 years as her husband is incapable. So she is afraid of getting involved in zina. Can she take a second husband.

Q: I am a second wife and my husband hasn't lived with me since the day of our walimah. It's been almost a year that we've been married and my husband only comes to me for 2-3 hours a day. In this year, I was also pregnant but the timing of my husband remained the same. Now I want him to stay with me the exact amount of time he didn't spend with me in the last year. 

Q: My wife is expecting to deliver our baby in a few weeks through caesarean. However, due to covid restrictions, the hospital is not allowing any visitors to bring children so I am unable to leave my young kids with anyone. My question is, can I give azaan and iqaamah to the newborn after the baby comes home after 3 days or is it necessary to give it soon after birth? If I can’t manage to visit then can I give it over the phone through video call?

Also, do I need to feed the new born with dates and honey? Just to lick it?

Can you please let me know what all I need to do Islamically for my new born baby?

Q: I wanted to share something about my parents and wife. My parents are not treating my wife well, we all stay under one roof. They say that you both (me and my wife) are equal to them, but when it comes to something they always consider me alone and not my wife. I always raise my voice against this but this leads to a disturbance at my home.

During Covid, I’ve been working at home since then and sometimes I wanted to take my wife out once in a month and that too creates issue. My parents say only you can go and not your wife.

She always wakes early and completes all her work of home but my parents don't even let her go to her own home. This is cruelty and I don't think Islam taught us this way.