Nikaah & Marriage Issues

Q: What advice can you give to me being a person seeking a spouse the halaal way. A lot of pressure is put on me especially because I am currently 27 years old.

Q: What is the status of what has now become a norm where a girl who is making nikaah holds a tea invitation a few days/week before her nikaah. They say that they do it as their numbers for walimah are limited and thus cannot invite everyone they'd like to like neighbour's, friends, etc.

Is this allowed? What should one do if one is invited to such a tea? It's a simple tea where they serve savouries etc., no intermingling, however it is done for the above mentioned reason.

Q: If a boy committed zina with a boy, how can he do ghusal after that?

Q: I am currently taking care of my parents who live in the unit next to me in a complex. My father wants me to buy a house so that I can accommodate the two of them (parents want to buy the house for me) but they do not want my husband to stay with us (they can't get along) and don't want my married children or grandchildren to visit on a regular basis. I cannot live without my husband and children. My parents want me exclusively to take care of them.

I'm the daughter and I have 3 brothers who don't want to take care of them because of previous issues with their wives. I do not mind living the way I'm living in a rented place because I have my own space and they have their own space.

Am I suppose to be listening to my parents or does my own family (husband) take priority. What is the Islamic view? 

Q: My wife will need to go to hospital for a heart bypass on the 23rd of October 2023. My problem is that I am working and do not have anyone to take care of her. Her brother and sister have opted for her to come stay with them until she recovers but the problem is that they are non-Muslims. Please help and suggest what must I do.

Q:

1. Is shaving the hair of a newborn child done before the aqeeqah or can we shave the child's hair after?

2. Can parents eat from the aqeeqah meat or not?

Q: In Behishti zewar theres one masala that states that if a husband passes away and then after a year the lady gives birth to a child, it will be attributed to him (she didnt get married again at all after his passing). Conception happens a few days as afterwards the nutfah dies and conception is only 9 to 10 months.

Is it normal for a mother to carry an offspring for 12 months?

Q: Are mess nights permissible in Islam? This is where the family gathers some nights before the nikaah and mess the bride/groom with holi powder or food.

Q: Will the nikaah be valid if it takes place in this manner:

The girl gives ijaazat to the boy to get her married. He then makes the nikaah in the proper manner with witnesses and the khutbah, etc., but he says she gave him permission and he accepts her in his nikaah.

Q: I am going to see a girl for a proposal/first meeting. Please can you advise what questions I can ask during this meeting.