Nikaah & Marriage Issues

Nikaah without witnesses

Q: I did ijab o qbul without mehar and wali and without witness 8 years ago. There was no physical relation but I realized it is wrong. I left that boy now and my father is getting me married to my cousin. Should I get married to him or tell my father about the nikah 8 years ago?

Using remote controlled sex toys when spouses live in different countries

Q: My wife and I live in different countries, and I have been advised that using sex toys is permissible if used by one's partner.

My question is: Can we use a remote-controlled sex toy, where I have control at times and she also has control at other times? Does this fall under acceptable use, or is it considered masturbation?

Secret nikaah and publicizing it after a while

Q: I am a 53 year old divorced female. My first cousin is 62 and he is recently divorced. We are both single, and are considering making Nikah. Because our families are very close, we are afraid that if we have a public Nikah, and the marriage subsequently does not work, this will cause immense stress on the entire family. Is it possible for us to do a non-public / secret Nikah for a while and then if all works out, we will then tell the family that we are married.