Q: I am an Egyptian girl, 16 years old and I was born a Muslim in a Muslim household. I’ve always believed in Allah and prayed. I never had any doubts towards the existence of God because I was born a Muslim and my parents taught me from a young age, since I was born, therefore I had no option but to believe, of course like any other born Muslim kid.
I didn’t know anything about other religions and the possibility of existence of atheists except in ancient times as I learned at school etc. like any typical child. I was like “OF COURSE THERE IS ALLAH.” I was happy, I prayed, everything was ok untill a month ago. I started diving deep on the internet, after I had bad thoughts like “how is there a God... does God really exist?’ etc.
I fell into a state of depression, gradually. I didnt sleep, I didnt eat, I lost weight and I got sick and I had to tell my mom to help me because I can't tell anyone else such a thing. She kept telling me “Its the Shaitan, and stuff like that... and we watched videos together to make me feel better.
I became slightly better after overthinking all the time to thinking less. I was always afraid, but now I feel empty. Im so afraid that I feel like I surrendered to my thoughts. I need guidance again, I just want my strong faith back... What do I do? Please help me.